Valley of the Doll

No Cards for You, North West Valley

2012-01-23T13:24:00.000-08:00

Today kicks off the Donors Choose promotional deal at Starbucks. Here's a little snippet from the Donors Choose website explaining a little more about it:

Thanks to a $4 million donation from the Wasserman Foundation, nearly 600,000 families will receive a FREE$15 DonorsChooseLA.org gift card to support a classroom project of their choice. Cards will be available at school sites!
Teachers can take advantage of these gift cards that will be distributed to families of your students by logging on at www.donorschoose.org/teachers and posting a classroom project of your choice. Posting a project should take no more than 15 minutes. More than 4,000 teachers have posted classroom projects to DonorsChooseLA.org!

This program has been absolutely wonderful in helping to provide a little relief for our school district at a time when we are in dire need of any and all financial help we can get.

Unfortunately, the Starbucks Donors Choose gift card portion of this windfall has fallen a little short as far as reaching as many needy schools as possible. Actually, it's fallen a lot short. There are ZERO schools in the North West Valley, nor any in the North East. This includes, but is not limited to:

Chatsworth

Granada Hills

Reseda

Northridge

Mission Hills

Sylmar

Porter Ranch

North Hills

Arleta

Pacoima

Lake View Terrace

You can peruse the list in its entirety (listed by zip code) here.

How is this possible? I know, I know... it is forever the lament of the Valley: "Waaah! We never get our fair share!", but in this case, I'm going to have to join the crybabies. Did LAUSD have absolutely no say in the mapping out of these gift card giveaways at Starbucks? Did Starbucks put the kibosh on the "at all Starbucks" wording on the Donors Choose website until just Friday? A reader writes to us that indeed, the website said: "...at all area Starbucks" until Friday morning when it was suddenly taken down and replaced with the list linked above.And what of our representative sitting on the Board of Education, Tamar Galatzan? Did the Board of Ed have any kind of input? And did T.G. ever raise her hand and say, "Uh... hold up, people"? No. I also understand isn't nice to look a gift horse in the mouth -- but when this is a program set out to benefit as many kids and schools as possible, and a huge section of neighborhoods of these children and schools are being overlooked... well, that kinda bugs me.

It should bug you too.

Love Machine

2012-01-22T04:35:00.001-08:00

love machine. porter ranch town center

Haha. I love the Ron Paul people... their "enthusiasm" (read: nuttiness) over their candidate is so very, uh, heartwarming. Yeah, that's it... heartwarming .

There was a dude driving this total Chick Magnet. I bet the hot babes are all fighting for the chance to ride shotgun in such a firme Love Machine.

Aye of Newt

2012-01-21T21:53:00.000-08:00

South Carolina Santa

I missed all the hot, live acceptance speechifying... but I got caught up at the usual places, and man oh man does it ever feel like Xmas morning all over again!

Joseph Mailander shares his epic Twitter feed from the evening over at street-hassle

Ken Layne & Co. (and by Co. I mean the Wonketeers lurking in the comments gallery) continue to mine comedy gold at Wonkette

Have fun. Merry Gingrichmas to us all!

It's Zac's Birthday.

2012-01-21T01:11:00.001-08:00

Today was supposed to be my friend Zac Champommier's birthday. He would have turned twenty if he hadn't been shot and killed by some of the most messed up, incompetent police/policing and law enforcement I've ever heard of. EVER. In my opinion, of course.

Miss you, Z.

You can read more about Zac's case here.

Joseph, Justin & Jennerjahn

2012-01-10T16:00:00.000-08:00

Ok, Justin Bieber has nothing to do with this, but he seemed to fit right in this Blingee so nicely.

TONIGHT: Join Joseph Mailander and Phil Jennerjahn as they take to the street-hassle blog once more for some hot, live, New Hampshire primary action!

The fun begins at 5:00 p.m.The power of Justin Bieber compels you to read street-hassle.... NOW! (IF YOU'RE READING THIS NOW AND IT IS 5:00 P.M.!)

You may also follow the boys on teh Twitter: @jfmailander, @philjennerjahn ..... oh, and @justinbieber

In other Valley news...

2012-01-10T15:14:00.000-08:00

Baby, pack up the Xanax and I'll meet you tonight in the auditorium at Beckford Charter for Enriched Studies! The Northridge West Neighborhood Council welcomes CD 12 Councilman Mitch Englander as their guest speaker tonight at the Council's first meeting of the new year.

The lulz begin promptly at 7:00 p.m.

Beckford Auditorium: 19130 Tulsa St., Northridge

Meh

2011-11-07T21:45:00.000-08:00

I was driving down our cul-de-sac with The Girl after picking her up from school this afternoon. "The jury reached a verdict," I mentioned. She instantly knew what I was talking about, having spent more than a few hours listening to her Courtroom Animal Dad talk about it ("Walgren was SUPERB! I couldn't have done it better myself!"), and seeing some of the highlight reels on the evening news for the lasts few weeks (which isn't at all the same as the evening news when I was her age, but that's a different blog post.) "What was it?" she asked as we pulled up the driveway. "Guilty," I said. "I knew it," she replied, fairly expressionless.

That was about the extent to which I've talked about this trial here at Chez Doll.

But if you've been following it, in whatever amounts, here ya go--knock yerselves out:

Conrad Murray Verdict 'Very Fair' - mtv.com

Guilty Verdict in Michael Jackson's Death Feels More Sad - NYDailyNews.com

Because we all need to know what's on Flava Flav's mind - zap2it.com

And now, of course, D.A. David Walgren has 1,400 fans on the David Walgren Is Hot Facebook page. -- Facebook

The whip comes down November 29th.

Garcetti for Mayor?

2011-09-08T13:50:00.000-07:00

Welp, it's official: Los Angeles City Council President, Eric Garcetti has announced his candidacy for Mayor of Los Angeles:

via the LAT:

Los Angeles City Council President Eric Garcetti said Thursday he will be a candidate to replace outgoing Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa in the 2013 election, promising to provide "leadership that brings people together."

Garcetti, 40, is the third elected official at City Hall to take the plunge, following in the steps of City Controller Wendy Greuel and Councilwoman Jan Perry. Fluent in Spanish, he is also the highest-profile Latino in the race, since his father -- former Dist. Atty. Gil Garcetti -- is of Mexican descent.

Unlike some of his rivals, Garcetti said there was nothing exploratory about his decision to form a mayoral campaign committee. "I'm running for mayor to get L.A. and our economy back on track. I'll bring focused leadership based on experience, practical know-how, and a willingness to embrace innovation," he said in a statement.

Hmm, I wonder what City Controller Wendy Greuel and Councilwoman Jan Perry are thinking right now.... or Austin Beutner... or dopey Kevin James, too, for that matter.

Mulholland Terrace over at street-hassle has some fine profiles up of a couple of the candidates you can read here:

Austin Beutner

Kevin James

And they're off!

2011-07-07T22:42:00.000-07:00

Alan Jackson

With an early start out of the campaigning gate, L.A. District Attorney candidate Alan Jackson sat down with local scribe Mulholland Terrace a couple of days ago over coffee and croissants.

In case you missed it earlier today, here's a snippet from their exchange via Street-Hassle:

The lawyer--very youthful-looking at 46--thinks his boss Steve Cooley has generally done a great job while DA. He doesn't at all begrudge the present District Attorney siding with prosecutor Jackie Lacey in the race. In changing the office, he may like to attempt to optimize the work of the 1,000 attorneys serving the County especially by implementing specialty-training programs, drawing from attorney's union input to provide the tools they need to make transitions when called to do so.

You can read more about their conversation and Jackson's plans for the District Attorney's office over at MT's fine blog, Street-Hassle.

For Zac Champommier

2011-06-24T01:00:00.000-07:00

It was a year ago today.

Zachary N. Champommier
1/21/92 - 6/24/10

We miss you, Zac.

xoxo

Join Zac's family and friends for a One Year Remembrance vigil, Friday, June 24th at the corner of Laurel Cyn. & Ventura Blvds. Zac's mother Carol will be there and will oversee a butterfly release in honor of Zac and his amazing life.

For more information on the status of Zac's case, please visit:

justiceforzac.blogspot.com

Look at MY sexy weiner!

2011-06-07T10:30:00.000-07:00

Doll's weenie, Daisy

Look people, this is the only weiner picture I ever want to have "Twitted" to me. Or "sextexted" to me. Or whatever the hell you people are calling it now. From the NYT:

At a news conference in Midtown Monday afternoon, RepresentativeAnthony D. Weiner tearfully confessed to sending a photo of himself in his underwear to a woman via Twitter and then lying about it.

Mr. Weiner said the indiscretion was part of a pattern of sending inappropriate and at times explicit photos and messages to women he met over the Internet.

Mr. Weiner, 46, a popular and brash Democrat from Queens who has been considering a run for mayor of New York City and is known for aggressive and sometimes intemperate political commentary on Twitter, apologized repeatedly.

Now, as far as sex scandals go this one rates a whopping "meh" on the Outrage Scale.

From Wonkette:

Weiner seems to have been prompted to come clean after more photos surfaced on BigGovernment.com this morning, one of them showing a smiling Weiner at home on a sofa with his cats. TRULY THE STUFF OF OUTRAGE.

I'm going back to doing my laundry now. Nothing else to see here. Move along.

Something smells rotten in Los Angeles

2011-05-12T09:14:00.000-07:00

photo: j. mailander

It's been a week since the official complaint was filed against those responsible for the death of Zac Champommier... and not a word about it from the local Fishwrap of Record.

Carol Champommier has filed a lawsuit in federal court for the wrongful shooting death last June of her son and only child, Zachary Champommier. Among those charged in the official complaint: the DEA, LAPD and LA County Sheriff's Department. You can read the complaint here. (pdf file)

This morning street-hassle reports a spike in violent crimes in Los Angeles, with little to no information coming from the Times (the last homicide occurred Friday, with no mention of it in the paper). From street-hassle:

The Mayor of Los Angeles, Antonio Villaraigosa, will answer the public's questions in a town hall on Monday, May 23, at 6 p.m. at Reseda High School. You must make your request to attend before May 18.

The Town Hall comes at a time when violent crime is up significantly in the City, including three in Ed Reyes' Council District 1 in the past week.

You can click here to register for the town hall meeting. I did. I think you should, too.

And while you're there, maybe you can drop a note to the Editor of the Daily News and push them to step up to the plate and start actually reporting the news of this city; a task apparently too bold and bothersome for the Los Angeles Times.

FAKE!

2011-04-27T12:37:00.000-07:00

American Patriot Donald Trump has managed to do the unimaginable -- he single-handedly pressured President Barack Obama into producing this so-called "birth certificate."

"I feel I've accomplished something really really important and I'm honored by it," Trump said at a press conference held during his pre-scheduled visit today to New Hampshire. Trump noted that people have long been requesting the document, but Trump was the only one who got the president to release it. Trump suggested Wednesday this development will boost his own potential presidential candidacy.

Obvs cheap shopped fake.

Don't worry Birthers..... the Sheriff is still near!

Whut?

2011-04-08T10:47:00.000-07:00

Mulholland Terrace posts a cheery piece on our Fave Mayoral Candidate and Unrepentent Race-Baiter, Kevin James, at street-hassle. Here's a jaunty little portion of the profile:

There's a little joking about how being an Assistant US Attorney, working money laundering, forensic accounting and RICO cases, might have prepared him for the Mayor's office. But in idle moments and spare time, James does enthuse to ponder the dark side of state. He's reading Andrew Bridge's Hope's Boy, for instance, the bestselling harrowing narrative of an orphan's institutional fostering in Los Angeles. The last book he finished was Fox News reporter's Chris Blatchford's Black Hand, about the workings of the contemporary Mexican Mafia.

Speaking of the Evil Browns... here's a little snippet from the Walter Moore "Brown People Suck" Mayoral Campaign Tour, featuring DJ Kevin James spinning a little somethin' somethin' about ETHNIC CLEANSING, here in Los Angeles. Yes... the Browns are systematically wiping out all the other races, starting with the Blaks first, and then they'll be moving on to your ethnicity soon, whatever it is, I'm sure... so don't go feeling all hurt and left out just yet.

I was fortunate enough to see Ol' Kev's BROWN IS BAD rap for myself at Walter Moore's Rally in the Valley, back when Walter had his fancy sights set on the Mayor's office.

Kevin James shilled for Walter Moore. I think that's all we need to know.

Waiter.... check, please.

Here you go... feast your eyes on the crazy. "Ethnic cleansing! Aaaaarrrgh!"

Good luck with that whole Mayoral Candidacy thang, Kev Dog. Ha ha.

Ha ha.

2011-04-05T13:12:00.000-07:00

What an ass.

An Open Letter to Kevin James

2011-03-17T17:23:00.000-07:00

Dear Kevin James,

I just read at my favorite blog, street-hassle, that you're running for Mayor of Los Angeles.

Oh, I also just read you've got Walter Moore shilling for you. Ha. This is fabulous! Also.

Thank you. This is the gift from above, the manna from heaven that I've been waiting for. You see... Doll's been a little blue lately, prolly the same color blue as the tie your wore yesterday at your press conference. But that's really neither here nor there.... what I'm trying to get at is I haven't been this happy in a really long time. Because I'm excited! I'm excited about all the fun I'm about to have.

Kevin James, thanx in advance 4 teh lulz.

xoxo

Valley Doll

ps. I didn't have time to make you a proper Blingee because of teh Girl Scout Camp Gettin' Ready, but I promise to make it up to you when I get home! <3 xo

What.The.Fuck.

2011-02-15T12:28:00.000-08:00

Oh.... I get it now! Ha ha ha ha! It's a two-fer!

From MayorSam's Los Angeles Politics Hotsheet for Tuesday:

Not sure what PETA would think of this but the City of Los Angeles is looking to hire a few good beaver trappers. No, not in Los Feliz or Woodland Hills, but at DWP facilities in the Owens Valley. I thought the City already had a beaver trapper?

A story about animals running amok in the O.V. Ok.

So how do the MS Misogynists represent this story in graphics? Like this:

Ha ha. Hey Mom.... get it? Get it? No?

Here, lemme 'splain, Grandma:

See, the man obvs has asked the woman to "shave her beaver", which we all know "beaver" is He-Man code for vagina, but see, the woman is so fucking stupid, she doesn't get it! And then that link at the end ties the whole BEAVER/VAGINA meme together nicely, as the link goes to Antonio Villaraigosa's City of Los Angeles' webpage, because OF THE ~~VAGINA~~ BEAVER.

A double zingah! A two-fer! Badda bing!

Well played, MayorSam! Well played!

Ugh.

Love to you

2011-02-14T00:15:00.000-08:00

"Love? What is it?

Most natural painkiller what there is.

LOVE."

— William S. Burroughs (Last Words: The Final Journals of William S. Burroughs)

Happy Valentine's Day from The Valley. I love you all madly; some of you more than others, sure, but some of you are much sweeter than the rest. Have a sweet day, Lovelies!

xoxo

Dude... WTF?

2011-02-09T17:09:00.000-08:00

Navraj Singh

Hi. That is Navraj Singh. He's running for City Council in District 12. I saw him speak last night for the first time, at a Neighborhood Council meeting. Dude is intense. Two things he said last night that made me LOL:

"I came here some 35 years ago, back when Nixon was President. I wish he was still President today; we wouldn't be in all the trouble we are."

and

"To me, Porter Ranch is, as Ronald Reagan once described, like a 'shining city upon a hill.'"

Waiter.... check please.

Show him the money

2011-02-08T16:46:00.000-08:00

Thanks, street-hassle, for not banning Zuma Dogg and/or the use of his name at your blog. Because had you indeed banned him (like another local blog has), I might have missed this:

CD 11 COUNCILMAN BILL ROSENDAHL -- GET THAT DUMB MOTHERFUCKER ON THE PHONE who insulted me on Friday AND TELL HER TO HURRY THE FUCK UP!!!

Hey L.A. City Hall -- when you going to settle up with Zuma Dogg? I think it's been long enough, and he's been pretty patient with your slow as molasses asses. Ha.

C'mon L.A., show Zuma Dogg the money.

You can finish reading the rest of Zuma's epic rant at his blog: L.A. City News - Los Angeles

Ruh Roh

2011-02-05T13:38:00.000-08:00

OH NOES!

Things aren't looking so swell at Camp Rudy; street-hassle has the latest on CD 14 candidate Rudy Martinez's Dead Cop Badge fiasco.

No es muy bueno:

The LAPD Complaint Adjudication on the matter of Rudy Martinez's acquired police badge, discovered in 2004, describes the actions of a man who "possessed a badge he knew he wasn't authorized to have" and who "obstructed the investigators from carrying out and fulfilling their duties" in the matter.

Yikes. Read the rest of the sordid story at street-hassle.

Teacher-bashing LA Times endorses Tamar

2011-01-25T16:23:00.000-08:00

The teacher-bashing former fishwrap of record has endorsed Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa's buddy, Tamar Galatzan in the March 8 election for School Board member representing District 3.

No big surprise. We could all see this one coming a mile away. Thanks for being so predictable LA Times.

Jose Huizar stole some candy? What?

2011-01-05T14:32:00.000-08:00

There's a scandal brewing over at Repug astroturf blog, MayorSam.

Apparently, MS blogger (and spellcheck hater and serial english/grammah killer) Scottie Waddie Johnson is all foaming about the mouth regarding CD 14 Councilman Jose Huizar stealing some candy. I think. I can't tell what the fuck he's trying to get at ... nothing but pictures of papers and lots of " " wordz. What does it all mean?

I keep reading his daily screeds about these missing CLARK bars and I agree, stealing candy from the kids of CD 14 is pretty heinous, and I hope Jill Stewart at the LA Weakly jumps right on this story!

What?

Gretzky the Cat haz a dead.

2010-12-18T15:52:00.000-08:00

"What dreames may come, When we haue shufflel'd off this mortall coile, Must giue vs pawse." -Shakespeare.

Poor Loretta Sanchez haz a sad this holiday season. Her beloved kitteh, Gretzky, has died. The awful news via Wonkette:

For the past hundred years or so, political people in Washington and Southern California have looked forward to nothing more than thewhimsical/weird Christmas Card sent out by Congresswoman Loretta Sanchez. Why? Because it showed a bit of whimsy/weirdness, which means it was utterly unique in the dead-soul forced-smile world of U.S. politics. Well, we hope you all enjoyed the fun of years past, with Loretta and her cat doing various funny things like surfing or riding motorcycles or burning twenty dollar bills. We hope you liked all that.

Because it’s over. Loretta’s cat died.

Let us take a moment to remember Gretzky...... ok, back to gift wrapping!

Happy Thanksgiving

2010-11-25T05:00:00.000-08:00

Wishing all my peeps both in the Valley and beyond, a very happy and peaceful Thanksgiving. Oh, go ahead-- sleep in on Friday; make yer own gifts this year. It'll be more fun to stay warm and cozy in your own bed and just cuddle. Trust.

Sweet Pickled Baby Jeebus

2010-11-09T16:29:00.000-08:00

Dear gawd.

I still can't wrap my mind around this monstrous family and their freakish fetus fetish bonding rituals between mother and son. Ugh. Here you go ... try not to vomit in your mouth a little:

via the New York Post:

George W. Bush's pro-life stance solidified when he was a teenager in Texas -- after his mother suffered a devastating miscarriage and showed him the fetus in a jar, the former president said in an extraordinary interview that airs tonight.
"She said to her teenage kid, 'Here's the fetus,' " the shockingly candid Bush told NBC's Matt Lauer, gesturing as if he were holding the jar during the TV chat, a DVD of which The Post exclusively obtained.

and...

Bush said his mother gave him special permission to recount the private story in print. But "the purpose of the story wasn't to try show the evolution of a pro-life point of view," Bush insisted to Lauer.

"It was really to show how my mom and I developed a relationship."

JEEZUS GAWD WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?? MONSTERS, I TELL YOU! MONSTERRRRRS!

What hath the Tea Partiers Wrought

2010-11-07T18:40:00.000-08:00

After the disaster that was known as the Attack of the Tea Partiers, the pundits will be spending the next few days analyzing the results of Tuesday’s elections.

But here’s one important aspect that will be overlooked by the network news, CNN, Fox News, et al.: Dancing with the Stars.

Okay, we all know that most of the “celebrities” on that show are about as well known as a lounge singer at an airport hotel. I usually don’t recognize half the names when each cast is announced. I guess I have a limited knowledge of models, ex-football players, ABC soap stars and reality legends-in-their-own minds.

But Bristol Palin’s claim to fame? Her mom, whom I confess to only learning about in 2009 when John McCain announced her as his running mate.

Oh, and Bristol became a “teen activist” because she got knocked up. Yep, if her mother hadn’t become a national public figure, Bristol wouldn’t be strutting her salsa moves on the tube but be living in Wasilla up to her non-shimmering hips in Huggies right now. Certainly she’s able to leave behind her kid with Sarah’s nannies while her compadres all over the country, 20 yr olds with one-and-a half year old toddlers, are trying to work at the McDonalds while also taking care of their children.

So even if DWTS has had pseudo celebs such as an astronaut, a co-founder of Apple, even a politician (Tom DeLay). Even if politics has been intertwined with entertainment ever since then presidential candidate Richard Nixon appeared on Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-In asking that enduring question, “Sock it to me?” back in 1968. Even if John McCain and Al Gore have hosted Saturday Night Live, does that mean we need to see Bristol paso-dobling with mom watching in the audience? With tea partiers calling in droves to vote to keep her on the show? Because, let’s face it, even Florence Henderson is a better dancer.

First DWTS. Then the election. Pray tell what’s next for conservatives on television: George W. Bush on Glee, Dick Chaney playing himself on CSI? People will fear turning on television, countless advertising dollars will be lose, more jobs will evaporate into thin air.

Those tea partiers must be stopped. Stop the madness. Stop voting for Bristol.

Oh. So THAT'S how it is.

2010-10-25T21:23:00.000-07:00

from the LA Times Opinion L.A.:

A front-page story in Monday's Los Angeles Times points to L.A. County Sheriff Lee Baca giving preferential treatment to Ezat Delijani, a real estate developer who has given several generous donations to Baca. The issue at hand: Delijani was in a rental dispute with one of his tenants over lease forgery. When the Beverly Hills Police Department concluded this was a civil matter, the real estate developer enlisted Baca for help; he wanted a criminal investigation. And that's what Delijani got. Baca is now downplaying his personal involvement, but the Times' investigation found:

[D]elijani's son sent an e-mail to Baca's assistant.
"Hi Susie, Hope you're well," Delijani's son, Shahram, wrote. "Can you please let the Sheriff know that I spoke to … Beverly Hills Police Department and they informed me that they will not investigate the case. Thank you."
On a printout of that e-mail, a handwritten note from Baca urges action from Chief Willie Miller, who at the time oversaw the Sheriff's Department detectives division.
"Chief Miller -- This case involves a 'lease forgery.' Could you have our people investigate this," reads Baca's note, which is signed "Lee B."
...

You gotta click to read the rest. It gets worse and even more unbelievable, and yet, the Times says it happened! What a crappy way to start the week, eh Sheriff Baca?

No costume? No worries!

2010-10-25T20:05:00.000-07:00

The HuffPo saves the day if you're short on $$$ but want to go long on lulz; last minute masks galore for you to download, print and then scare the crap outta the neighborhood kiddies.

Have fun, freaks.

WTF L.A.?

2010-10-23T18:26:00.000-07:00

Looking (and waiting) for answers in Studio City

How does The Law in NY treat a law enforcement shooting and killing of a young man?

First this:

BOSTON -- A New York state prosecutor says she will get to the truth behind the police shooting of a Pace University student from Massachusetts there over the weekend, even as family and friends of the popular football player are reeling from news of his death.
Westchester County District Attorney Janet DiFiore said she will interview Danroy "D.J." Henry's parents and sort out the conflicting reports between police officers and witnesses as to what led to the shooting outside a Westchester County strip mall restaurant early Sunday.

and now this:

BOSTON -- The U.S. Justice Department announced Friday that it has begun monitoring the death investigation of a North Easton college student shot and killed by police in New York last weekend.

And how does L.A. treat the law enforcement shooting and killing of a young man? Are there any clearer answers since that night on June 24, when law enforcement officers shot and killed Zac Champommier?

::crickets::

Not a word from Sheriff Lee Baca, other than to blame Zac, and suggest that he asked for it:

"The nature of [Champommier's] aggressive actions — actually hitting the deputy — that is not someone who is without some degree of fault," Sheriff Lee Baca said.

Not a word from our District Attorney. Nothing.

Apparently, the State of New York cares much more about its citizens and protecting them. Ain't it a damn shame the City of Los Angeles doesn't feel the same towards its citizens?

The Great Nate

2010-10-07T08:58:00.000-07:00

Well folks, looks like another bad sign for Meg Whitman; Joe B. over at MS's drops this little morning bomb:

$140 Million Up In Smoke? -according to the FiveThirtyEight forecasting model, gubernatorial candidate Jerry Brown is now a 75% favorite to become the next governor of California.

Did you say FiveThirtyEight? Blog of the All-Knowing, All-Seeing, Baseball/Politics Statistician-Psephologist Geek NATE SILVER?

Not familiar with Nate? Here's a snippet of his Wiki:

In 2007 Silver began to publish analyses and predictions related to the 2008 United States presidential election under the pseudonym "Poblano." At first this work appeared on the political blog Daily Kos, but in March 2008 Silver established his own website, FiveThirtyEight.com. On May 30, he revealed his real name to his readers and dropped the "Poblano" moniker on his website.[4] By summer of that year, he began to appear as an electoral and political analyst in national print, online, and cable news media.

The accuracy of his November 2008 presidential election predictions – he correctly predicted the winner of 49 of the 50 states [FTW!-VD] – won Silver further attention and commendation. The only state he missed was Indiana.

Nate Silver! Baby, that's all you had to say! Sorry eMeg. Hell, you should have just sent me a check directly out of that 140 Large you spent like it was a Girl's Weekend in Vegas. Our own Cali stimulus! But nooooo ... dumbass. It's been real Meg... see you on the flip side.

El Mero Mero Ass Clown

2010-10-06T13:34:00.000-07:00

Sweet baby cheeses; Rioja Spot in CD 14 is up to his old crybaby ways again! Pinche llorón. I'm not sure, because I don't speak IDIOT, but it's something about Assemblyman Mike Gatto buying random domain names and selling them for profit a million years ago, when you could make some bank doing so.

Sounds like something the Fresh Prince of Porter Ranch would do. Ha ha. He has his mother's sense of humor like that.

Anyilliterateteabagger, here's the latest piece from Red Spot (past winner of our CRYBABY OF THE DAY AWARD... BWAAAAAA!) in which he once again sodomizes the written word. With no lube. Also. [Bracketed smartass responses are mine]

Now lets take RightTarded.com and LeftTarded.com. For a person who has run for public office twice in the past, one must ask Assemblyman Gatto why he would create these two domains. Was the reason that Gatto set up these two domains, because he felt that those on the Left and Right, had mental issues? [No, just you, Red Spot, you insane nitwit] We have ask many questions [O rly? You have "ask" many questions?] about now Assemblyman Gatto's political proclivities, like for example his treatment of citizen journalists, his stonewalling on the Legalization of Marijuana. But never have we associated these, to any mental issues.

Now WTF was all that about? I DON'T KNOW! Ha ha... I really liked this response from the comment section of MayorSam's:

ColbertReport said:

The COLBERT REPORT is featuring this on tonight's show!

Special guest: Rabid rightwinger Scott Johnson, being interviewed about his "witsch huntt" against Mike Gatto.

Colbert: You say you've uncovered evidence of an unsuccessful domain business. What is the significance therein?

Johnson: I think it shows that we can't trust any Democrat to balance the budget. If they can't sell domain names at a profit, can they run our state? I myself bought www.wehireformerSunderRamanistaffersHereAtMayorSam.org and was able to re-sell it for 2 cents!

Colbert: It is rumored that Gatto's wife also tried to sell a wedding website?

Johnson: Yes, and I suspect it was for gay weddings, clearly.

Colbert: You think Gatto also tried to sell software websites, and geographically based ones, that don't even end in dot.com?

Johnson: Yes, some were dot.ca, and some were dot.fm. I am currently investimagatin' if Gatto is in fact a resident of Canada or the Fuma Maja islands. If so, he is not eligible to run for President!

Colbert: I've used the term rightarded to describe people like you. I think it's a political term to describe people who are so blinded by their right-wing predilections, that they are just nuts.

Johnson: Well, crap, Eric Hacopian didn't tell me that. But then again, he was crying in his soup when he contacted me.

Colbert: Sum up your feelings on Mike Gatto.

Johnson: I have a man-crush on him, but like all Republicans, I will fight it for years while trying to trash his rep.

Colbert: Thanks for joining us Scott Johnson, aka Red Spot!!!!

[wild applause].

Everyone be sure to watch Red Spot on the Colbert Report tonight!

OMG -- Mr. or Ms. Commenter, you rock! That was hilarious! It's funny because Red Spot isn't in on the joke, and now the joke is obvs on him! Hahahaha.

And Mayor Sam continues to let this fuckery go up at his fine blog. I guess the joke's on him, too.

What a damn shame.

This time it wasn't the butler who did it.

2010-09-30T05:14:00.000-07:00

Poor, poor Meg Whitman; seems the brown illegals are causing her trouble yet again and Steve Lopez at the LAT wants to know more about it:

But wait a minute. The no-nonsense candidate who opposes a path to legal citizenship, and wants the government to go after businesses that hire illegal immigrants, didn't feel the need to report the housekeeper to authorities when she confessed?

What did she think might happen? That the housekeeper would go back where she came from? That someone else would hire her not knowing she was illegal?

Or did she maybe think to herself, privately, of course, that the housekeeper was a decent person trying to live a better life in a country where wealthy people like Whitman are all too happy to hire them, and not terribly inclined to probe their backgrounds?

Another set of questions jumped out at me, posed from the commentariat of the Steve Lopez piece; questions which all have merit and which all need to be answered fairly quickly if Meg Whitman has any chance of saving this seemingly downward spiral of a campaign:

Meg:
Why didn't you sue the agency?

Why didn't you report this to IRS, ICE and/or local law enforcement?

Why didn't you help this woman find an immigration attorney to make things right?

Why didn't you pay this woman mileage and expenses?

Why are you still running for governor?

Good quesions. Let's see if eMeg the eLegal Employer has the right answers, and does it even matter now, or is this campaign all but over?

Oh Noes! Sundero Say It Ain't So!

2010-09-04T17:41:00.000-07:00

justin bieber haz a sad

Uh to the ohs!

Looks like illegal messican alien Sundero Ramani has once again gotten himself into some agua caliente! Ay caramba! Seems Sundero has allegedly pulled a Richard AlarCON and is carpetbagging in Burbank in an effort to win the 43rd district assembly seat in the upcoming November election against current 43rd assembly dude Mike Gatto.

From the Los Angeles Times:

The Los Angeles County district attorney's office is looking into whether Sunder Ramani, the Republican candidate on the Nov. 2 ballot, lives in the 43rd Assembly District, as he reported on voter registration and candidacy papers under penalty of perjury.

David Demerjian, head of the district attorney's public integrity division, said he was checking on Ramani's residency after receiving complaints about a week ago from people claiming to have evidence that the candidate still lives in a home he and his wife own in La Cañada Flintridge, outside the district.

Oops! And this on the heels of other allegations of wrong doing, namely failing to properly report his financial records. Thankfully, the Ramani campaign people used the good ol' Paris Hilton/Lindsay Lohan excuse: 'It wasn't me!" and the old chestnut: "I DIDN'T KNOW doing _________was ILLEGAL!!" (fill in blank)

Well played, Sundero Ramani! Well played!

From the Glendale News-Press:

Sunder Ramani failed to properly file fundraising reports earlier this year during his campaign for the 43rd Assembly District, but the state Fair Political Practices Commission did not issue a fine after concluding his campaign manager was unaware of the rules.

Hmmmm.... very, very inneresting character that Sundero Ramani. Carpetbagger? Also?

Justice for Zac

2010-08-08T19:30:00.000-07:00

Beep beep for Zac, 8.6.10

For the second week in a row, family and friends of Studio City shooting victim Zac Champommier gathered on the northeast corner of Laurel Canyon and Ventura boulevards in an attempt to raise awareness of his death at the hands of law enforcement officers in Studio City on June 24, 2010.

Supporters of an independent investigation into the actions of law enforcement officers that evening have started a new blog devoted to seeking just that. Justice for Zac has links to the local blog stories as well as links to the local government officials who should be asking just what the hell happened that night in their districts, on behalf of their constituents.

Don't they know? Or do they just not care?

A debriefing in a parking lot with plainclothes officers,

unmarked cars, no taped-off secured "police area",

and one scared boy.

When will there finally be an independent investigation? Zac's friends and family are waiting for answers. So are the rest of us.

Justice for Zac.

OHTHANKGAWD

2010-07-18T13:58:00.000-07:00

Zack and the boys are back in town! Just in the nick of time!

From Billboard.com

Rage Against the Machine frontman Zack de la Rocha is stepping up his campaign to compel the state of Arizona to repeal its controversial immigration law. In addition to adding Ry Cooder, Nine Inch Nails, and comedian Chris Rock to the growing list of artists who are refusing to perform there as part of The Sound Strike boycott effort, de la Rocha tells Billboard.com that plans are in the works for a series of protest concerts in July.

"In the coming weeks we are going to be organizing a series of concerts that are respectful of the nature of the boycott in its attempts to isolate the Arizona government but not isolate the people, and especially the organizations that are fighting this on the ground," de la Rocha said in a telephone interview. "Many of us have begun to plan concerts that include bands that have signed on the Sound Strike, and make tickets available so that people within Arizona can come and see these concerts as they roll out. These are things that are being set into motion right now - a series of concerts or maybe even one giant concert in late July."

De la Rocha says that "there's a strong chance" Rage Against the Machine will play one or more of the concerts.

It's now official via NME:

Rage Against the Machine and Conor Oberst have announced plans to play a benefit concert in Los Angeles in protest over Arizona's controversial immigration laws.

The acts are part of a coalition of bands, also including Sonic Youth, Massive Attack, Kanye West and Serj Tankian, who say they will not play any gigs in the state until the bill, called SB 1070, is amended.

The bill allows police in Arizona to challenge anybody they suspect of being an illegal immigrant to prove their status officially. Failure to do so will result in arrest.

Named The Sound Strike, the protest group has already set up a petition at Thesoundstrike.net – the concert is to be staged at the Hollywood Palladium on July 23, reports the LA Times.

The gig will be Rage's first show in their hometown in 10 years.

Please join me as we bow our heads for a moment of prayer:

Dear Various Deities,

Could you please a help a sista out in scoring some tix for this most historical and epic of musical occasions in the history of El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reina de los Ángeles del Río de Porciúncula? Kthxbai.

Amen, &c.

I've got so much trouble on my mind

2010-07-18T00:43:00.000-07:00

The spirit of Chuck D. was invoked last night. It got me to thinking a lot, which is usually a dangerous proposition. Political poison in our grassroots well; law enforcement officers killing our sons... oh man. And it's only just starting to heat up in the city.

More to say later... but for now, I'll let the boys from Public Enemy do the talking for me.

Oh, and hey L.A. -- Welcome to the Terrordome.

Two Things...

2010-07-10T15:34:00.000-07:00

...I whispered to my butterfly. Hope you heard them. -- xoxo

R.I.P. Zac Champommier.

Cause nothing's hid...from us kids

2010-06-30T11:20:00.000-07:00

"YOU AIN'T FOOLIN' NOBODY..."

For the friends of Zac Champommier, who know the truth.

Neighborhood #3 (Power Out), Arcade Fire

Kids,

"If there's something fucked up in your heart... put it in your hand as a sword." -Win Butler, Arcade Fire

The Truth has always been a mighty and powerful sword.

I'm really proud of all of you for standing up and speaking out for Zac and for being the wonderfully loving, compassionate, smart and funny group of kids you are.

[UPDATE JULY 9: The memorial service was amazing. You kids are so incredibly talented and sweet and good and you were awesome today.]

love you madly,

VDoll

xoxo

Then and Now

2010-06-10T15:57:00.000-07:00

THEN:

(Sam) Gilbert's influence ultimately helped land UCLA basketball on NCAA probation. In December 1981, UCLA was cited for nine infractions and received two years' probation, which included a one-year NCAA tournament ban and an order to vacate its 1980 NCAA national title game appearance against Louisville.

The Times established that Gilbert, during Wooden's heyday, helped players get cars, clothes, airline tickets and scalpers' prices for UCLA season tickets. Gilbert allegedly even arranged abortions for players' girlfriends.

[...]

One former UCLA All-American told The Times: "What do you want me to say? That's my school. I don't want to see them take away all those championships." Gilbert considered many NCAA rules arcane and silly.

[...]

Larry Farmer, who played for Wooden and later became head coach, remarked of Gilbert: "I saw him move mountains."

The Times' investigation concluded Gilbert probably committed several NCAA violations in his dealings with UCLA players.

Wooden, in 1981, told The Times: "There's as much crookedness as you want to find. There was something Abraham Lincoln said — he'd rather trust and be disappointed than distrust and be miserable all the time. Maybe I trusted too much."

NOW:

Citing a history of misdeeds that "strike at the heart" of college amateurism, the NCAA hit USC with a string of penalties Thursday that will keep the powerhouse Trojans football team out of bowl games for the next two seasons and could cost the university millions of dollars.

[...]

In addition to the postseason ban, the football program will lose 10 scholarships a season for three seasons and face additional restrictions in how and when its coaches may recruit high school prospects. The Trojans must forfeit victories from part of 2004 and all of 2005, which could jeopardize their 2004 national championship.

Those filthy Bruins were able to bounce back from their years and years of dirty dealings.

We think the Trojans are just going to keep Fighting On..

And that's all we have to say about that.

Yer Valley of the Doll voting slate which we completely ripped off from GPW

2010-06-08T12:56:00.000-07:00

hawt

We're leaving soon to pick up our little Valley Princess from school and then we're off to vote.

If you're like me and didn't head to the polls first thing in the morning, here's a handy-dandy slate for you from our friends at Griffith Park Wayist. Just print it up and take it along to the polls. Or not.

USA! USA! USA!

also.

xoxo

OMG! We are made famous in teh Gawker!

2010-06-07T13:21:00.000-07:00

My pretend secret ginger boyfriend, Jim Newell has once again made me famous.

Ok, it wasn't really Newell, and it isn't really me that's been made famous. So it's not me... but rather my awesome Blingee skillz. Which is really an extension of me and my psyche, so yeah... MEEEE!

Thanks to poster ripdash for finding my Newell Blingee and sharing it with the world over at Gawker. It was a labor of lurve making it and it needed to be shared.

Here is Newell's first post on this Gawker thing we've heard of but never really bothered looking at (I think we looked at it once and said "meh"). But now with Newell there... we will read this Gawker thing every fucking day for the rest of our lives. Also.

So what's going on here? I come directly from the "notorious" political comedy blog Wonkette.com, where I had been an editor since 2007. The first six months of that term were under the ownership of the Gawker, after which we went independent in order to become more, uh, authentic, and also because Gawker Media was getting rid of us. We went on to do a bunch of silly things, like single-handedly getting Barack Obama elected president and his health care bill through Congress, with some jokes thrown in along the way.

It was fun. But now it's over, and I'm here with you lovely people!

We have so much to... look forward to... in American politics, really, for the foreseeable future. Right now is a rare moment when members of Congress are simultaneously working through a major legislative agenda and campaigning hard for November's elections, a patriotic tandem of incentives that provides us with insane amounts of hourly bullshit to cover. And right after the election, Republican presidential candidates will be throwing their hats in the ring. Yes, already! Literally within a matter of months! Around Thanksgiving time!

[...]

God I am so looking forward to covering those Republican primary debates early next year, and so should you.

We can hardly wait, Jim.

Steve Blair -- Hero of the Tea Klux Klan

2010-06-05T12:13:00.000-07:00

Disgusting piece of shit Arizona councilman and ex-AM radio host Steve Blair has been fired from his radio talk show because he is a racist piece of shit. Also.

But no worries, this Teabagger Patriot has found a fan base... yesh.... none other than the friendly neighborhood WHITE SUPREMACISTS! YAY!

Oh my gawd... these nuts are unbelievable. A few of their thoughts on this whole poor Steve Blair fiasco and the state of poor, white Arizonans:

So Arizonans must think the whole country's arrayed against them. The righteous wrath of the American people against the elite cannot be restrained much longer. Perhaps it's time for another "Moroni" to emerge from the ranks of the people, stand forth and hoist a "Title of Liberty", as described in Alma 46 of the Book of Mormon (substitute Obama for Amalickiah and it makes Alma 46 more relevant to our day).

Jeebus those wingnuts are a bunch of scary motherfuckers, aren't they?

Fin

2010-06-02T16:00:00.000-07:00

Peace out, Newell.

Thanks again.... for everything.

xoxo

It's Memorial Day and Why Does Sunder Ramani Hate Our Ghey Veterans?

2010-05-31T19:15:00.000-07:00

gay veterans

Oh noes, not again! The Sunder Ramani camp has been caught Screwing the Ghey Pooch this time!

There's an advertisement floating around on non-English television supposedly from a group identified as "the California ProLife Council 2010". On behalf of Sunder Ramani, they inform viewers that rival candidate Mike Gatto is "a supporter of gay and lesbian marriage" while Sunder Ramani is for "traditional family values" and "natural marriage between man and woman."

Funny, those are the same arguments white supremacists used to justify miscegenation laws.

SOME STATS FOR MR. RAMANI ON THIS MEMORIAL DAY WHEN WE SALUTE THE SACRIFICES OF OUR VETERANS, BOTH GAY AND STRAIGHT VETERANS:

From the Urban Institute Research of Record study on Gay Men an Lesbians in the U.S. Military --

Estimates suggest that more than 36,000 gay men and lesbians are serving in active duty, representing 2.5 percent of active duty personnel. When the guard and reserve are included, nearly 65,000 men and women in uniform are likely gay or lesbian, accounting for 2.8 percent of military personnel. Other key findings from this research brief:

Gay men and lesbians have served in all military eras in the later part of the 20th century. In particular,military service rates for coupled lesbians far exceed rates for other women in every military era of the later 20th century. Nearly one in 10 coupled lesbians age 63-67 report that they served in Korea, compared with less than one in 100 of other women. Even in the most recent service period from 1990 to 2000, service rates among coupled lesbians age 18-27 are more than three times higher than rates among other women.
While years of service do not differ much between coupled gay men and other men, lesbians report longer terms of service than other women. Among all women age 18-67 who report military service, nearly 82 percent of coupled lesbians and less than 74 percent of other women report serving more than two years.
Coupled gay men who are veterans or report training in the guard or reserve show greater racial and ethnic diversity than other men. Among men who report guard or reserve training, the proportions of coupled gay men who are African American and Latino exceed those of other men. Among female veterans, the pattern is the opposite of that shown with men. Coupled lesbians are more likely to be white than other female veterans and are less likely to be African American.
Coupled gay men who report guard or reserve training or who are veterans report annual incomes below that of other men, while coupled lesbians report incomes above that of other women. An exploration of employment status provides some explanation for the income gaps observed. Coupled gay men with guard or reserve training are less likely to be employed full time and more likely to not be in the labor force than other men. Conversely, coupled lesbians who are veterans or report guard or reserve training have substantially higher rates of full-time employment than other women and are less likely to report not being in the labor force.
North Dakota, Hawaii, Alaska, Virginia, and Idaho have the largest proportion of veterans among same-sex couples. Men and women in same-sex couples in North Dakota are twice as likely to be a veteran than the national average. Among metropolitan areas, Pensacola, FL, Norfolk, VA, San Diego, CA, Dayton, OH, and Santa Rosa, CA, have the highest rates of veterans among same-sex couples. Pensacola's rate of 34 percent is more than three times the national average.
Nearly one million gay and lesbian Americans are veterans. The states with the largest population of gay and lesbian veterans include California, Florida, Texas, New York, and Georgia. Among metropolitan areas, Los Angeles, Washington, DC, San Diego, Chicago, and New York have the highest populations of gay and lesbian veterans.
The District of Columbia leads all states with a rate of 10.2 gay or lesbian veterans per one thousand adults, more than double the national average. Per capita rates are also high in Vermont, Hawaii, Maine, and Washington. Santa Rosa, Pensacola, San Francisco, San Diego, and Norfolk are among the metropolitan areas with the highest per capita rates of gay and lesbian veterans.

Imagine the disappointment upon viewing this video criticizing Assembly candidate Mike Gatto's tolerance for LGBTG civil rights issues.

Apparently, Republican candidate Sunder Ramani supports the discrimination of our bravest and most truest Americans; Americans who fought for Mr. Ramani's freedoms and who will continue to do so for his children and his children's children.

Watch this video and see the how disrespectful this is, and how hurtful it must be to a gay veteran to see this on Memorial Day:

To all our gay veterans, I say thank you... and I hope to live to see the day when you are treated equally in this country. We're not all haters. Southern Californians need to decide whether they support discrimination and hate or if they support equal rights and love for all residents of Assembly District 43. Also.

KEN LAYNE IS GOD

2010-05-28T08:42:00.000-07:00

The View From Her Window

Wasilla, Alaska, 2:08 p.m.

(click photo to enlarge)

There's a hole in my heart that goes all the way to China

2010-05-26T15:06:00.000-07:00

My Pretend Super Secret Ginge Boyfriend Jim Newell is leaving Wonkette. Also.

Bye Jim. Thanks for the laughs.

Fawk. Now I'm going to have to start reading Gawker.

That is all.

Crybaby of the Day

2010-05-25T08:20:00.000-07:00

...is none other than MayorSam blogger Scott Johnson. Ha.

MayorSam blogger Rat Spot, the Crybaby.

Old Valley White Guy Endorses Illegal Mexican Alien Sundero Ramani

2010-05-24T09:55:00.000-07:00

Illegal Mexican Alien Sundero Ramani, and his Mexican family. How do we know this brown man is really an American citizen? Hmmmm???

Ron Kaye (former editor of the Daily News) has given his support to Illegal Mexican Alien candidate, Sundero Ramani. Ay Carumba! I like Ron a lot, and I know he cares about the community, but his endorsement is so representative of the Valley of 30 years ago. Sorry Ron. We've changed, we've evolved, we aren't cranky about billboards. Apparently, we aren't the only ones not bowled over by the endorsement.

Over at Griffith Park Wayist, blogger Mulholland Terrace writes:

When Ron Kaye got home yesterday, he sat down and endorsed Mickey Kaus, Gloria Romero, Marcia Winograd, and Sunder Ramani. We're up for endorsing the women on that list, not the men.

To be honest, I really don't think anyone not republican and younger than 40 even noticed the endorsement. Well, I'm sure those readers in the age bracket of my grandparents (75-99) took note. But that's about it.

Monday Morning Music

2010-05-24T09:26:00.000-07:00

IT'S SUNDAY AND MONKEY GOD HEATHEN SUNDER RAMANI STILL HATES TEH GHEYS

2010-05-23T16:23:00.000-07:00

What a lovely weekend it's been! So much fun to be had in the Valley when the weather is so crisp and cool and sunny all at the same time!

Well, on Friday over at MayorSam, I asked for anyone... anyone at all to refute the fact that Sunder Ramani supports the discrimination of gays and of course, all I got for a response was the sound of crickets chirping off in the distance.

Oh, I take that back... some "anonymous" poster at MayorSam tried to deflect by citing which Republicans support gay marriage and which Democrats have come out against gay marriage. But I wasn't asking for a general roll call. Just one candidate's position on the issue.

Funny, still no mention of where Ramani stands on LGBT civil rights issues at all over at MayorSam. All Ramani people seem to be able to do is point fingers everywhere else but at themselves on answering the questions that are important to a large section of the constituency of the Assembly district seat for which he is vying.

And I suppose that's all voters need to know about Sunder Ramani.

Thank the Monkey God that Mr. Ramani isn't discriminated against because of his ethnicity or his worshipping of Monkey Gods.

Also.

DAILY NEWS: Vote for Gatto: Fiscally minded and intelligent, he's the kind of legislator California needs

2010-05-21T16:27:00.000-07:00

Ha ha... no Blingee required.
This photo speaks for itself. Fucking clowns.

Ha ha.

This just keeps getting funnier every single day that passes.

Looks like anti-gay Assembly candidate Sunder Ramani is having a totally bad day. First, Joe B. reposted this piece by yours truly over at MayorSam's, and now the Daily News has basically told Ramani and his campaign team to go eat a steaming bowl of dick. Ha ha.

Man, who the hell is this guy's Cheif Political Strategist? EPIC FAIL FOR YOU! (you have to say that with the Soup Nazi Guy's accent). You did not prepare your candidate even REMOTELY adequately enough, what with his vague answers and anti-civil rights stance.

Well, well.... lookie here. What has Google wrought? Why it's none other than current Repub FAIL JOHN THOMAS (not to be confused with an actual PENIS) who is the Chief Strategist in question. Yah, yah... I know he scored for Trutanich and Cooley... but what has he done for the RNC lately?

That's who's manning the helm of this Ramani shipwreck of Titanic proportions. JUMP SHIP JOHN THOMAS! SAVE YOURSELF! You know what happened to Leo at the end of the movie. It did not end well.

And what the hell kind of parents name their son after PENIS? Blech, I should have known.... THESE kind of parents (ugh), you know the type, rich, white, Republicans from Pasadena, Glendale, La Canada Flintridge. The ones who have to join the Foothills Lincoln Club (WTF?) in order to get their son's foot in the door. Talk about Helicopter Parents! (MayorSam's fave term for parents who hover over their children to make sure little Johnnie gets ahead in life).

When Republicans reproduce....

Why Does Sunder Ramani Hate Teh Gheys?

2010-05-20T15:29:00.000-07:00

More news in the race for Assembly District 43!

Uh ohs. Seems the Sunder Ramani camp has been caught Screwing the Pooch (a certain local blogger's fave phrase for... for... well, I'm not really sure what the hell it means, but hey, I'll use it here because why not?).

The Burbank Blogger posts some pretty damning audio of Ramani campaign callers using the H8 card with the Armenian community:

"...latest developments prove that Sunder Ramani... is playing full blown ethnic politics, and this lucky Burbanker has the proof. I've heard for a week or so now about Ramani operatives targeting calls to Armenians and telling them that they shouldn't vote for Gatto because he supports "homosexual legislation". All my Armenian friends have been seriously irked that Ramani thinks he can divide their community with such a classless tact".

That is so totally typical. Here's the audio. Try not to get sick listening to the hate spewing from ~~the~~ ~~Ramani~~ ~~camp~~ someone identifying themselves as Ramani people. Ugh! Gross!

Oh Noes! Secret Meetings! Ha ha.

2010-05-19T16:30:00.000-07:00

I know this is already a week old, but it still makes me laugh to see it up at MayorSam's.... the infamous Mike Gatto - Chahe Keuroghelian "secret meeting" photos. OMG, MayorSam was trying to get all TMZ on us -- but it's just silly.

How do you have a secret meeting in public? Outside? With other actual human beings around? How is that a secret meeting? As Chad Ochocinco would say: That don't make no damn sense.

secret meetng = DMNDS

Oh, the wingnuts make me LOL. ::insert Pee Wee Herman insane laugh::

Carry on with your wingnuttery!

It's Creepy Thursday!

2010-04-08T09:00:00.000-07:00

First, I was totally creeped out by this Tiger Woods ad featuring his dead father scolding him from the grave.

Now Kevin Roderick continues the creepiness. From Griffith Park Wayist:

I can't help but click elsewhere, and note that a local commercial blog used the occasion of a Council aide's fire to promote its own Twitter stream.

Wow, way to pimp your Twitter feed... on the back of someone else's misfortune. Thank gawd it was only someone's HOUSE ON FIRE and not anything serious, jesus. Stay classy, Kev!

The Good, The Bad and The Creepy

2010-04-08T01:48:00.000-07:00

Well, first and foremost, the Good:

He's baaack! After a seemingly endless hiatus, Michael Higby has taken the shutters down over at MayorSam. Posts have been slowly trickling in, and just in the nick of time! That pesky Mayor Tony Villar is up to his old tricks! [MayorSam]

The Bad:

City Controller Wendy Greuel says we're going to be broke as a joke come May 5. [LA DAILY]

The totally Creepy:

Tiger Woods and Nike have released the "Tiger in the Woodshed" commercial, featuring Tiger Woods' dead daddy, Earl in a creepy as hell voice-over cameo from beyond the grave. [via Dlisted]

Really??

2010-03-15T16:23:00.000-07:00

from EW.com:

On The View this morning, Barbara Walters said Rielle Hunter, the mistress of former presidential candidate John Edwards, had called her in tears over the suggestive nature of some of the photos accompanying Hunter’s lengthy GQ profile. Hunter told Walters she had screamed for two hours upon seeing photos that show her bare-legged on a bed, wearing only a man’s white dress shirt (“John’s shirt?” quipped Elisabeth Hasselbeck) and a pearl necklace. Hunter told Walters she had trusted the photographer, Mark Seliger, and believed him when he told her “he thought there might be one” usable shot that showed her being sexy.

Dumbass. And she calls herself a PROFESSIONAL VIDEOGRAPHER/PHOTOGRAPHER?? Shut the fuck up!

Okay, from the infamously hilarious GQ interview are a few of my favorite Rielle quotes -- Forever -- What a clown (interviewer's questions in bold, especially delish ironic answer-parts bold and italicized)

When did Johnny start to tell you that there were problems in his marriage?
Well, I was aware of it from the get-go. He doesn't lie to me.

How can you be sure?
He doesn't lie to me. He discloses everything to me. And he has no fear of lying to me. Part of the problem—it's the fear of what's gonna happen that causes the lie. And the hiding. The fear of the repercussions. And, well, first of all, infidelity doesn't happen in healthy marriages. The break in the marriage happens before the infidelity. And that break happened, you know, two and a half decades before I got there. So the home was wrecked already. I was not the Home Wrecker.

So you have enough of a bond with him that, even though you know he's lied to his wife and his state and the country, you really never worry that he will lie to you?
No. He does not lie to me. At all.

Because he doesn't have to worry about the repercussions?
He's not afraid of me. He'll tell me anything and everything. Even disclosing to me when women hit on him, and everything that was said, and if he flirted. He has no fear that I'm going to abuse him. And I believe what happened in his marriage is, he could not go to his wife and say, "We have an issue." Because he would be pummeled. So he had a huge fear. Most of his mistakes or errors in judgment were because of his fear of the wrath of Elizabeth. He's allowed himself to be pushed into a lot of things that he wouldn't normally do because of Elizabeth's story line. And the spin that she wants to put out there. He was emasculated. And you know, the wrath of Elizabeth is a mighty wrath.

Hahahaha. Bitch, please.

So now we know John Edwards IS NOT A LIAR. At least not to Rielle. We also learn that John Edwards did not leave his wife ~~BECAUSE HE WAS AFRAID SHE WOULD KICK HIS ASS~~ because he was afraid of the repercussions.

No, really. Shut the fuck up, Rielle. You're making him look like more of an asshole than we already presumed he was. Now we know he was also an unrepentant pussy. And you're still a clown.

Also.

When the sick are in charge of the sick

2010-02-24T16:27:00.000-08:00

I don't even know what to do with this:

from the LAT:

The executive director of Napa State Hospital, a Northern California mental institution whose patients include convicted child molesters, was arrested Wednesday on suspicion of sexually molesting a foster child in his care for more than a decade.

[snip...]

An appointee of Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, Foulk allegedly began molesting the then-10-year-old boy in the fall of 1992, shortly after taking him in as a foster child. They lived in Long Beach at the time, authorities said.

[more snippage...]

Prosecutors said there are "numerous" additional victims "who fall outside the statute of limitations."

For those of you who swear that because a person does it once, gets caught and never gets caught doing it again (think: Roman Polanski), I'm sorry to inform you that is incorrect. The classic pedophile is more cautious in choosing his subsequent victims after being caught.

It's textbook Abnormal Psych 101

Also.

Love to you

2010-02-14T02:06:00.000-08:00

"Love? What is it?

Most natural painkiller what there is.

LOVE."

— William S. Burroughs (Last Words: The Final Journals of William S. Burroughs)

Happy Valentine's Day to all the special people in my life I love and admire so much. You know who you are.

May your day be filled with lots of warm and fuzzy moments and people who love you madly. Just know, I'm there with you in spirit.

xoxo

L.A. Times... Home of All The Moldy News That's Really Too Old To Print, But What The Hell, Let's Print It Anyway.

2010-02-13T12:22:00.000-08:00

something smells fishy

STOP THE PRESSES!

The Blogger Currently Known As Mulholland Terrace tipped us off yesterday to just how current the L.A. Times really is; once again, the Times jumps the shark by breaking a 15 year-old story.

from Griffith Park Wayist:

The former fishwrap of record also publishes some really old news on Ramon Cortines this morning. (The former group Pulitzer winner formerly at the former fishwrap of record swallowed it whole.) Early morning rumbles from the Northwest Valley insist that the District librarian mafia is responsible for making the story new again.

Today, 4LAKids exposes even further what a non-story this supposed new story really is:

The Times published a Part I/Page 1 story [L.A. UNIFIED SCHOOLS' CHIEF WORKS FOR DISTRICT SUPPLIER |http://bit.ly/9JZ4Fx], it got picked up by the AP and CBS and the LA Weekly (a free publication that subsides on ads for escort services and medical marijuana dispensaries can't be all bad ...it's not like they're a billboard company!). The blogosphere is up in arms, the townspeople are restless; the Red Queen demands heads!

The secret was no secret at all, of course.

4LAKids has written of it -- as has CutsHurtKids, another edublog focused on LAUSD. Cortines disclosed the potential conflict of interest when he came to the District – as I'm sure he did when he joined the mayor's staff. He has been a Scholastic board member for fifteen years.

Forbes has posted the detail on their website [ http://bit.ly/9Nbshd] – Cortines' other interests are described at the Business Week website:[http://bit.ly/9LkOTS] including affiliations with Edison Learning, Inc, The J. Paul Getty Trust Inc, Common Sense Media, Inc., K12, Inc .and Teachers Support Network, Inc. Five Million Kids [http://bit.ly/awWOZA] reports he is a consultant to the Eli Broad Foundation LA, William & Flora Hewlett Foundation, Menlo Park, CA, James Irvine Foundation S.F., and The Institute for Learning University of Pittsburgh.

When do we get a real newspaper in this town?

The Fab Feb. 4 Fellas

2010-02-04T16:21:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday to Los Angeles City Council Preznit Mr. Eric Garcetti and local scribe Mr. Joseph Mailander.

Here's hoping the next year brings even MORE fun and more fun adventures!

xoxo

Norm, baby, please....

2010-01-13T13:47:00.000-08:00

Come to Doll....

Peace In

2010-01-12T20:45:00.000-08:00

Peace Out

2010-01-11T20:01:00.000-08:00

Eww....

2010-01-05T02:51:00.000-08:00

Vanity Fair's newest cover boy is none other than infamous Lothario Tiger Woods. The Annie Leibovitz pic was taken before the sex scandal... uhhh.... errupted, as it were. Is it me, or is Tiger's forced attempt at looking studly coming off as completely and totally lame? What I think he's going for is: Look at me, I'm a golfer who's just as hard and in shape as my basketball, baseball and football playin' brethren and I get mine.

But what it's screaming to me is: I'm really a narcissistic Mama's Boy who's used to getting everything he wants, whenever he wants it. The whole Thug Life look he's going for is really the last cry of a poser in search of any validity. Also.

Popeater highlights a snippet of the VF piece which revisits the insecure golf phenom's past sexually lewd (but in no way sexy) eyebrow-raising comments :

Woods' persona always seemed carefully controlled -- except for one interview he gave in 1997 for GQ.

"What I can't figure out is why so many good-looking women hang around baseball and basketball. Is it because, you know, people always say that, like, black guys have big d---s?" Woods said.

The golfer made a joke by rubbing the tips of his shoes together and describing it as "a black guy taking his condom off." He also made another lewd quip about lesbians and oral sex, during the photo shoot for the magazine.

Ugh.

High School Musical in the Valley!

2010-01-04T21:16:00.000-08:00

If you're like me and you live in the Valley AND have a High School Musical fan in residence... I've got good news for you!

The Phillips Performing Arts is proud to announce their production of High School Musical at the Madrid Theater in Canoga Park. Our friend and budding superstar actress Sadie will be playing the part of Sharpay this weekend! We know she's going to rock the house!

Take some friends! Pre-paid 4-packs for the matinees are available for purchase; four tickets for $50.00! For more information, drop an email to Aimmee: AIMMEE@DYNSOLUSA.COM

PHILLIPS PERFORMING ARTS MTFK (A NON-PROFIT ORGANIZATION)
presents
High School Musical at the Madrid Theater
21622 Sherman Way, Canoga Park, CA 91303

Directed by Obba Babatunde, Choreography by Rena Phillips and Sherman Steward, Musical Direction by DeBorah Sharpe-Taylor

FOR ADDITIONAL DATES AND TO PURCHASE TICKETS ONLINE: http://madridtheatre.tix.com/

Steve Cooley: Attorney General?

2009-12-30T11:53:00.000-08:00

That certainly seems to be the word out on the street. About an hour ago at MayorSam's, Michael Higby hinted at a possible run:

Sources in the know say that Los Angeles District Attorney is reportedly considering jumping into the race for the Republican nomination for California Attorney General. Developing.

The Metropolitan News-Enterprise gives us a few more details:

Sounding very much like someone who has made up his mind to run, he told the MetNews that he has “been strongly encouraged in the last several months” to seek the post “and I am definitely considering it.” He said he wanted to “get through the holidays and the bowl games” and will announce his decision in the next 10 to 12 days.
His decision, he said, “boils down to one thing—who is best suited to be California’s chief law enforcement officer.” While the attorney general heads a department with “several core missions,” he explained, the job “needs an experienced, reliable, seasoned law enforcement type.”

MetNews also goes on to quote Mr. Cooley's former boss on his chances for election:

Former District Attorney Robert Philibosian, a longtime friend and advisor of Cooley’s and his former boss, as well as a prominent lawyer/lobbyist considered an astute observer of state politics, said there were “many reasons why I think he’d be elected.”

“Of all of the candidates who I have heard of he has the most experience and the most seniority...and the widest range of experience,” he commented. He added that Cooley has far more statewide name identification than any other candidate and is a proven fundraiser.

He added that while Harman has been endorsed by all or nearly all of the Republicans in the Legislature, and is “well-known, well-respected, and well-liked in Orange County...his base is not anywhere near as large as Cooley’s,” nor does he have Cooley’s hands-on executive and law enforcement experience.
Cooley would be particularly potent in a general election, Philibosian adds, where the Democrats’ registration advantage makes a Republican win dependent on heavy crossover voting.

“He has had a lot of support from Democrats in the district attorney’s races,” Philibosian noted, some from people whose intense personal loyalty “would transcend any party designation” and be translated into “substantial money and endorsements.”
Political consultant Fred Huebscher, who is not working for anybody in the race, agreed with Philibosian’s analysis. He said that Cooley was “highly likely to win in the primary, and there’s not a Democrat running who can beat Steve Cooley in the general election.”

Since there's nothing left to do but wait and see if he does indeed decide to run, any guesses as to who might be able to fill his DA shoes?

Party in the CD 2

2009-12-09T12:24:00.000-08:00

Remembering

2009-12-08T14:38:00.000-08:00

Oh hey look, Roman's home.

2009-12-07T08:43:00.000-08:00

Roman Polanski's Swiss masturbatorium...

In case you missed this little tidbit on Friday:

from the LA Times:

Roman Polanski was out of prison and at his Swiss chalet this morning after posting $4.5 million bail, the latest twist in the effort by L.A. prosecutors to extradite the director to the U.S. for sentencing in a three-decade old child sex case.

"Roman Polanski was today released from custody pending extradition and transferred to Gstaad, where he is under house arrest at his chalet. Polanski has undertaken not to leave his house and property at any time," the Swiss government said in a statement.

Polanski was greeted at his chalet in the resort town of Gstaad by his children, Elvis, 9, and Morgane, 16, and his wife, actress Emmanuelle Seigner. There were also scores of reporters and camera crews outside to capture the moment.

Awwwww... how sweet!

Roman, in honor of your release from jail for skipping out on our US laws (such as they are) before you were sentenced for RAPING a 13-year-old little girl (as ALL 13-year-old girls are little girls, sorry guys... get over your "Lolita /Waif" fantasies), this little diddy is for you:

Now go fuck off and die, Rapist.

OH NOES!!

2009-12-04T19:31:00.001-08:00

OMG.... VAMPIRES IN NORTHRIDGE!!!

Help me jeebus, help me!

I'm going to check it out. You should, too. If you don't, then you suck.

xoxo

Christine Essel... You Suck

2009-12-04T15:56:00.000-08:00

Why does Christine Essel insist on making Hello Kitty sad?

Well, well, well....

Seems Little Miss Sunshine, Chris, oh, excuse me.... Christine (like the creepy Stephen King novel) Essel has her power pantsuit in a bind because of a mailer Paul Krekorian sent out depicting her as a puppet for power-union IBEW.

David Markland at MetblogsLA takes note of the ol' Campaign-Mailer-Switcheroo Essel's campaign has pulled:

Paul Krekorian recently mailed out a flier depicting political opponent Chris Essel as a marionette alongside text reading, “Chris Essel. Brought to you by the union bosses who are raising your DWP rates.” (original here)
Just a few days before voters Los Angeles City Council District 2 will decide which of the two will be their next Councilperson, Essel responded with a flier of her own, alleging that the image of her having her strings pulled is “sexist” and “insensitive of women.” One quote on her flier even has a Sunland resident quoted as saying, “I’d kick his butt if that was my wife.” (see it here)
Additionally, Essel’s flier reprints the image of her as a marionette, it removes the contextual text, replaces it with a headshot by Krekorian, but alleges right below the image: “Actual Krekorian Mailer.”

Additionally, the Essel mailer goes on to claim:

Krekorian and his supporters have unleashed a shocking barrage of nasty, sexist and anti-semitic personal attacks on Christine Essel often referring to her as the “whore”, “streetwalker”, “pig” and “b*&ch.”

Where on Earth are the facts to back these charges up, because I sure haven't seen any such thing nor heard any such remarks coming from the Krekorian camp.

If there's one thing I hate, it's a desperate woman with an agenda; one who would sell out her sisters all in the name of Getting Ahead.

Chris Essel is gross. And while I don't have a pony in this race, and until now have not had much of an opinion of these two candidates for CD2, I have to say this pathetic attempt at rustling up votes using the gender card just about does it for me.

Chris Essel is a very sad, misguided woman for letting herself be used in this way by her male campaign handlers. They are the ones who are sexist, not Krekorian. Shallman and team have really set the bar low for their client and I don't know any self-respecting woman who'd have anything to do with a group of men who'd sell out her gender like that.

For shame, Christine Essel! For shaaaaaame!

For selling us girls out, that crazy Essel bitch (yah, I said it!) gets 10 SAD HELLO KITTY FACES ON ELECTION DAY (out of a possible 10).

VOTE KREKORIAN.

That is all.

Oh, by the way..... don't throw out all those crappy Essel mailers.... MayorSam reports that Candidate Krekorian is RECYCLING ALL THE BULLCRAP! Gather up yer mailers and have them recycled!

Go visit MayorSam to get the deets.... it's a great idea! Ha.

xoxo

Why it matters

2009-11-29T11:53:00.000-08:00

It's another gloriously wonderful day to be a Trojan, or just someone who loves the Mighty Men of Troy -- as the Bruins went down yet again at the hands of the magnificience that is Pete Carroll's mad coaching skillz.

Over at Griffith Park Wayist, blogger Mulholland Terrace wonders what all the fuss is about:

USC faithful chanted "We run LA!" as the game ended. A city a billion in debt, Carmen the Clown of counsel to both, etc.--why on earth would anyone want to admit such a thing?

Perhaps it is because in a city void of any professional football team, fans of the sport naturally look to its next best thing: college teams. In a city where our young boys and young men (and the Girlies, too) have no opportunity to root for or display any civic pride in a local professional football team, having one INCREDIBLY AWESOME AND FURIOUSLY FANTASTIC college team in the Trojans (and the also-ran team of the Bruins) and... suddenly the niche is filled for a city clamoring for some football.

It's true ... our city is doing one big Crash and Burn all around us and it has been suggested that we seek solace in the fact that culturally, our city hasn't looked this bright and vibrant in a very long time. So, too, can the young sports enthusiasts of our city take pride in our local collegiate sports programs... as well they should.

Our kids have enough to worry about in the City of Los Angeles; their school district is a joke; their Mayor a failure; who even knows what kind of city they'll inherit once they leave school, the nest and head out into the real world of life in the City of Angels.

For now, let them just have this simple thing ... their local cross-town rivalry, their bragging rights, their pride in their local team ... whichever colors they choose to sport, Cardinal and Gold, or Powder Blue and Yellow. Both teams belong to them, and to all of us looking for something in this goddamn city worth rooting for.

Fight on!

2009-11-28T14:56:00.000-08:00

Good luck St. Pete and my Mighty Men of Troy. We'll be pulling for you guys here at Chez Doll.

The Fresh Prince of Porter Ranch has 30 of his closest Granada Hills High School Trojan and Bruin friends coming over for a 50-sandwich tray and 8 large pizza pies. Of course, the pre-requisite chips, dips, candy, cookies, cupcakes, sodas galore, etc...

I'm sure we'll be out of food after the first half.

TROJANS.... BEAT... THE... BRUINS!

xoxo

Well look what we have here...

2009-11-25T10:32:00.000-08:00

Heh.

Apparently, the Bruin faithful could give a shit about their campus mascot.

from the Daily News:

WESTWOOD - UCLA's Bruin Bear statue got splattered with red and gold paint in advance of this weekend's crosstown matchup with USC. The statue in Bruin Square had been covered but was vandalized some time between 10 p.m. Tuesday and 6 a.m. today, said Phil Hampton of UCLA.

Since Monday, the statue had been covered by a protective tarpaulin for the traditional "rivalry week" that precedes the annual football game, Hampton said. The tarp was cut by the vandal or vandals, Hampton said. Crews were working to remove the paint.

The case was being investigated as a felony vandalism, Hampton said.

At USC, the Tommy Trojan statue was under wraps and being guarded by students.

Happy Thanksgiving, you filthy animals.

"So I got THAT going for me... which is nice"

2009-11-13T08:28:00.000-08:00

Profiles of the Rich and Stupid

2009-11-07T16:22:00.000-08:00

That's right... spend all yer monies on ridiculously lavish living, and then when the bill comes blame someone else.

Jacob Bernstein over at the Daily Beast has the low-down on Nicolas Cage, who is suing his ex-financial manager for mis-managing his fortune, while taking no personal responsibility for his current financial situation and the outlandish lifestyle he chose to lead.

Good grief... this guy knew how to blow money:

And now the actor is suing his former money manager, Samuel J. Levin, for $20 million in Los Angeles Superior Court, claiming he enriched himself while “sending Cage down a path toward financial ruin.” (Levin declined comment for this article.)

Whether the actor proves his former money manager is at fault remains to be seen, but conversations with several sources close to Cage reveal a person whose financial problems stemmed at least in part from his own profligate spending. As they tell it, Cage’s appetite was extreme even for Hollywood, with a decade-plus shopping spree that saw him snapping up houses, motorcycles, a jet, yachts, vintage and new cars, expensive watches, meteorites, dinosaur skulls, an enormous pet collection, massive amounts of jewelry for the women in his life, group vacations for his entire entourage, and on and on and on. “He lived like a sheik,” says one person who’s known him for several years. “Spent money like it was water,” says another.

Read the rest of this sad, sad tale of how one poor millionaire managed to blow it all...

Boo hoo.

Happy Birthday Kitty!

2009-11-01T00:02:00.000-07:00

Today is the big day! Hello Kitty turns 35!

Here's the haps on the festivities taking place at Royal/T:

Hello Kitty Birthday Party
• Birthday goody bags to the first 100 visitors

10AM – 12PM
• Breakfast with Hello Kitty
• Hello Kitty themed waffle and pancake dishes will be available in the café
• Visit from Hello Kitty

12PM – 1PM
• Artist workshop with one of the Three Apples artists
• Workshop will include a hands-on project with the artist (advanced registration)

1PM – 2PM
• Hello Kitty tattoo booth
• Various artists will create one-of-a-kind temporary tattoos

2PM – 3PM
• “Mama’s Apple Pie” interactive contest wheel

3PM – 4PM
• Birthday cake with Hello Kitty!

Yay! See you there!

MEEE-OW!

2009-10-23T10:37:00.000-07:00

Royal/T - cafe/shop/art space, culver city

In honor of the impending 35th birthday of my very favorite kitty in the whole wide world, Hello Kitty, Royal/T has lots of fun planned for Kitty Krazed fans (like moi!):

Here's the schedule of all the festivities taking place this weekend [via the Sanrio website]:

Saturday October 24, 2009 All Day 10AM-10PM
Super Fan Day at Three Apples!

Today is all about the Super Fans! Free Super Fan gift bags to the first 100 visitors! (oooh.... can the Girl and I get up and out of the house that early?? We can sure try!!)

10AM -1PM :
Hello Kitty Brunch! Bring your favorite friends to a fabulous Hello Kitty brunch here you can enjoy scrumptious Hello Kitty-themed waffles & pancakes and a live DJ set.

1 PM -2PM and 3PM -4PM :
Meet the Designers! A very special appearance by ‘Kitty Mama’ Yuko Yamaguchi Hello Kitty head designer straight from Tokyo) & tokidoki creator, Simone Legno — and the launch of the exclusive tokidoki for Hello Kitty 35th Anniversary collection — follows.

2PM -3PM :
Hands-on Jewelry Workshop with Three Apples artist Natalia Fabia! This workshop has a materials fee of $15 and requires pre-registry. Register Here!

4PM – 5PM :
Yummy Hello Kitty sushi & bento box workshop with acclaimed chef Sushi Girl
Sorry! (This workshop is full. Please join us for a different fun event!)

5PM -7PM :
Hello Kitty Happy Hour with Lovemade for fans 21+

7PM – 10PM :
Hello Kitty-Oke karaoke dance party with Karaoke Queen Raina Lee (author of Hit Me with Your Best Shot: A Guide To Karaoke Domination) Hello Kitty-oke Dance Party with Karaoke Queen Raina Lee

All Day Long! - Photo ops with Hello Kitty herself!

Oh man, we are SO THERE!

[UPDATE: Here's a little tidbit we found at the LA Weekly about Kitty, Royal/T AND YUMMY DAVE NAVARRO!]

Enough with the moisture...

2009-10-15T14:39:00.001-07:00

THANK GAWD the rain is moving along. Not that that's doing me any good today. I'm having a really bad Yoko Ono hair day.

On second thought, I think I'm having a really bad Chaka Khan hair day.

Either way... I'm screwed.

Republicans Hate Fake Acorn Pimps; LOVE REAL LIFE GANG-RAPE!

2009-10-15T11:56:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's true:

OH HELLS TO THA NOES! Repubs must stop PRETEND HO'S AND PIMPS from doing business on the gubmint dime ... but OH HELLS YES they SUPPORT REAL GANG RAPINGS on the gubmint dime.

Apples and oranges people... apples and oranges.

See, ACORN helping fake broke-ass (see def. #4, bitches) pimps and ho's get on with their bad self cannot be tolerated.

But HALLIBURTON can help rapists get away with GANG RAPING employees cause that's the 'Merican Way! Hooray gubmint! Hooray captialism! Hooray gubmint sponsored rape!

USA! USA! USA!

from huffpo with an excellent Jon Stewart clip:

In 2005, Jamie Leigh Jones was gang-raped by her Halliburton/KBR co-workers while working in Iraq and locked in a shipping container for over a day to
prevent her from reporting her attack. The rape occurred outside of U.S. criminal jurisdiction, but to add serious insult to serious injury she was not allowed to sue KBR because her employment contract said that sexual assault allegations would only be heard in private arbitration--a process that overwhelmingly favors corporations.

This year, Sen. Al Franken (D-MN) proposed an amendment that would deny defense contracts to companies that ask employees to sign away the right to sue. It passed, but it wasn't the slam dunk Jon Stewart expected. Instead the amendment received 30 nay votes all from Republicans. "I understand we're a divided country, some disagreements on health care. How is ANYONE against this?" He asked.

Apparently, 30 United States Senators were against this. Not surprisingly, ALL 30 were Republicans.

Just remember that girlies... Republican Senators Support Rapists.

The End.

The New "Face" of the GOP

2009-10-15T10:23:00.001-07:00

Warho, indeed!

Wowza. This is indeed the finest picture of Dopey McMeghan McCabe I've ever seen! No seriously, the face, unadorned, is really sweet.

But for christsakes... why on Earth does she have two infants stuffed under her tank top like that??!! Look at those two poor baby heads struggling to be free.

Meghan, Meghan, Meghan.... why do you hate babies so?

[UPDATE: I have improoooved Meghans TwitnitwitPic. Behold my masterpiece below:]

[via Wonkette]

Why 'Tonio has got to go-nio

2009-10-03T13:45:00.000-07:00

Joseph Mailander pens a damning argument for why Los Angeles' Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa should RESIGN HIS OFFICE, tout de suite! But he also points out, the blame for the downward spiral of this city rests not only on the padded shoulders of the mayor:

It is not only the Mayor, of course--the city's top administrators and City Council have also failed as the services they are elected to provide continue to deteriorate.

So many top administrators--Police, Fire, now the Water & Power chief--have resigned, and some--like the Animal Services chief--in ignominy. The Chief of Staff left in mystery. The former head of Building and Safety has been charged with a sex crime. The recent election in the northeast valley fetched only 12% of registered voters, and only 5% on election day itself. Lawmen have been rummaging through the political lives of the living and the dead. A bad tree brings forth bad fruit; the politics of the city are recognizably bad fruit.

You can finish reading the rest of The Mayor Should Resign here.

Ok, this Twatting must end.

2009-09-04T01:25:00.000-07:00

I can't even begin to wrap my already fragile mind around the thought of this: The Rev. Al Sharpton Tweeting away from Michael Jackson's burial service.

What. The. Fresh. Baked. Holy. Hell.

People has the deets:

Sharpton sent Twitter messages from the funeral, saying that before the family arrived he was speaking with Thomas Messereau, who successfully defended Jackson against child molestation charges.

"What MJ went through was so unfair, yet he succeeded," Sharpton Tweeted. "In the end, he was the biggest artist ever. He faced the headwinds but he made it."

Sweet merciful Jeebus--what kind of ass Tweets from a funeral??

Al Sharpton, of course. Twatter Supreme.

Now what do we do?

2009-07-13T19:15:00.000-07:00

Well, it's official: Tamar Galatzan has thrown her hat into the Council District 2 race.

This really comes as no surprise. Los Angeles Times blogger Steve Hymon had her number months ago...

from the Bottleneck Blog:

So what does any of this have to do with LAUSD school board member Tamar Galatzan?

Galatzan, who received more than $2 million in campaign help from a Villaraigosa-controlled committee, toppled school board incumbent Jon Lauritzen last year to win a seat on the school board. Shortly after she won election, I phoned her and asked if the rumors were true that she was going to run for Greuel's seat in 2009 if Greuel ran and won city controller?

No, said Galatzan.

I called her again Wednesday and asked the same question. But I got a different answer this time:

"I'm flattered that my name has come up and people have been talking to me about it and it's something I'm considering," said Galatzan, who is now 13 months into her four-year term as a school board member.

I reminded her of our conversation last year. "I don't remember what it was I told you," she said.

[...]

Next, I asked Galatzan about a YouTube video I had just watched. In the video -- shot during her campaign in the spring of 2007 -- Galatazan said: "I am really running for school board to make sure that my boys get the kind of world class public education that they are entitled to."

Later in the video she complained that an elementary school in Sherman Oaks didn't have enough money to purchase more paper for the copy machine. Then, in the video, she said, "You know me as someone who ruffles feathers and isn't afraid to ask tough questions. I keep my word and I stand up for what I believe in."

So, I asked, what does it say about her honesty that last year she said that she wouldn't run and now she's saying she might.

"That's definitely something I'm thinking a lot about. It really comes down to what can I do about [making] the community...the kind of place my kids and my family are safe and how are my skills best used," she said. "It's been an interesting year at L.A. Unified and the truth is I don't know how much I can do on the Board or any one person can do on the Board."

[...]

Why do reporters hate themselves in the morning?

Because I stupidly did not ask her about the tens of thousands of current and future LAUSD students she represents besides her own children -- many of whom don't have a mom who can run for office.

The few parents I've spoken with after her announcement have voiced disappointment and more than a little annoyance with Tamar. She was elected to do a job, they say, and now that we parents need her more than ever, she's ditched us ... before she's even finished serving out her elected term. Sounds like another recent quitter in the news. But what differentiates our local "quitter" from the Quitta from Wasilla, is that Tamar hasn't officially quit her school board seat, instead she's using her position on the school board as a stepping stone to a different job, a higher paying job to be sure, and one that will be helpful to the man who helped get her elected to the school board: Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa. She will attempt to do her school board job while campaigning hard the next few weeks for the CD 2 election on September 22. Good luck with that.

As for all the recent public outreach Tamar and her staff have been engaging in (Non Title I School Parent Summits, Student Video Contests, etc.), it all feels and rings hollow now. Those Non Title I School meetings and video contests seem more planned for future campaign resume fluffing and for campaign literature and commercial use than to truly help frustrated parents try to effect change for their children and for LAUSD in general. Apparently, I'm not the only one who's noticed the timing in all of this, and the scheduling and locations of where she's been stumping the hardest.

But now what? Now who do we Valley parents turn to for help navigating the maze that is LAUSD? We had hoped Tamar would help us, but it seems we parents have been left to fend for ourselves with nary a "by your leave..." from Ms. Galatzan. A search of her Los Angeles school board website has no official announcement from Ms. Galatzan regarding her decision to run for the Council seat recently vacated by newly elected City Controller Wendy Gruehl or what this means for the parents and students in her district. There are no assurances to parents that her work on our behalf would continue, or even reasons why she felt the need to leave her position for a new shinier one.

Nothing. Not a peep.

I attended one of Tamar's Parent Summits at Balboa Magnet Elementary. I wasn't alone; a large group of parents sat right along side me for roughly three hours on a Saturday morning as we listened to Tamar and her staff go on an on about Non Title I and how we would organize and work together to change The Way Things Are currently in the battle of the Haves (Title I schools) and the Have Nots (Non Title I schools). Now in hindsight, it feels like those three hours were my unwitting contribution to the "Elect Tamar for CD 2" campaign. Little did I know that I'd be playing the part as "extra" in what I'm sure will be photos and video footage of that summit at Balboa Magnet. She managed to suck in a lot of desperate and anxious administrators, parents and teachers for her three hour campaign photo shoot.

But hey, I can't really complain; I scored some warm and yummy LAUSD coffee-cake out of that ~~hostage situation~~ Parent Summit deal. So, yeah... thanks for that Tamar. It wasn't a total waste of a beautiful Saturday I could have spent in a hundred more productive ways and with my family.

Oh, and good luck to you in all your future endeavors. It's been real. Real disappointing.

"When the going gets weird...

2009-07-05T18:12:00.001-07:00

Hunter S. Thompson

...the weird turn pro". --Hunter S. Thompson

In case you're just getting home from a holiday weekend on a secluded island with no contact with the outside world: last Friday before the start of the holiday weekend, Alaska's most angriest Anger Bear Sarah Palin resigned the governership of Alaska.

Paul Begala muses: if only the good Doctor were here to see this Walking Fail go down in flames:

I wish Hunter S. Thompson had lived to see this... It was an almost impossible mission, but in resigning from office with 17 months to go in her first term, Sarah Palin has made herself the bull goose loony of the GOP.

[snip...]

Let's stipulate that if there is some heretofore unknown personal, medical or family crisis, this was the right move. But Gov. Palin didn't say anything like that. Her statement was incoherent, bizarre and juvenile. The text, as posted on Gov. Palin's official website, uses 2,549 words and 18 exclamation points. Lincoln freed the slaves with 719 words and nary an exclamation; Mr. Jefferson declared our independence in 1,322 words and, again, no exclamation points. Nixon resigned the presidency in 1,796 words -- still no exclamation points. Gov. Palin capitalized words at random - whole words, like "TO," "HELP," and "AND," and the first letter of "Troops."

Next, Sarah the Barraquitter let loose her legal hounds on the 4th of July (on Twitter no less! notes Wonkette's Ken Layne) and threatend to sue BLOGGERS and everyone else on the internet who tried to report on the rumors swirling around her resignation, most particularly those reported by blogger Shannyn Moore. That's it... if you don't like what people are saying about you, after you've put yourself in a position to be talked about... SUE THE PANTS OFF 'EM!

Using the substantial might of the Executive branch of government to bring down unenforceable legal threats on a private citizen in Alaska, and attempting to curtail free speech through intimidation on the Fourth of July? Not a particularly brilliant PR move. By specifically singling out and naming Moore, Palin has done two things; she has shown herself to be a reactionary immature politician, and she has made Shannyn Moore a lot better known. And she is not the only one in Sarah Palin's crosshairs, mind you. You stand warned Huffington Post, New York Times, MSNBC and The Washington Post! You just better knock it off!

Awww, Sarah Barraquitter haz a sad because the Internets are mean to her!

Let's take a look back, shall we, on the advice she gave to one Hillary Clinton on Hillz's "whining" about being picked on by the media, and Sarah's take on exactly how to handle the Media Meanie Bo Beanies:

Ha ha. That Sarah Palin... always good for a laugh. Expect more lulz as the Spinmeisters proclaim her latest meltdown "BRILLIANT!"

Happy 4th of July

2009-07-01T15:00:00.000-07:00

I'm off on vacation for the next few days. Have a safe & sane Fourth of July!

America

America I've given you all and now I'm nothing.
America two dollars and twenty-seven cents January 17, 1956.
I can't stand my own mind.
America when will we end the human war?
Go fuck yourself with your atom bomb
I don't feel good don't bother me.
I won't write my poem till I'm in my right mind.
America when will you be angelic?
When will you take off your clothes?
When will you look at yourself through the grave?
When will you be worthy of your million Trotskyites?
America why are your libraries full of tears?
America when will you send your eggs to India?
I'm sick of your insane demands.
When can I go into the supermarket and buy what I need with my good looks?
America after all it is you and I who are perfect not the next world.
Your machinery is too much for me.
You made me want to be a saint.
There must be some other way to settle this argument.
Burroughs is in Tangiers I don't think he'll come back it's sinister.
Are you being sinister or is this some form of practical joke?
I'm trying to come to the point.
I refuse to give up my obsession.
America stop pushing I know what I'm doing.
America the plum blossoms are falling.
I haven't read the newspapers for months, everyday somebody goes on trial for
murder.
America I feel sentimental about the Wobblies.
America I used to be a communist when I was a kid and I'm not sorry.
I smoke marijuana every chance I get.
I sit in my house for days on end and stare at the roses in the closet.
When I go to Chinatown I get drunk and never get laid.
My mind is made up there's going to be trouble.
You should have seen me reading Marx.
My psychoanalyst thinks I'm perfectly right.
I won't say the Lord's Prayer.
I have mystical visions and cosmic vibrations.
America I still haven't told you what you did to Uncle Max after he came over
from Russia.

I'm addressing you.
Are you going to let our emotional life be run by Time Magazine?
I'm obsessed by Time Magazine.
I read it every week.
Its cover stares at me every time I slink past the corner candystore.
I read it in the basement of the Berkeley Public Library.
It's always telling me about responsibility. Businessmen are serious. Movie
producers are serious. Everybody's serious but me.
It occurs to me that I am America.
I am talking to myself again.

Asia is rising against me.
I haven't got a chinaman's chance.
I'd better consider my national resources.
My national resources consist of two joints of marijuana millions of genitals
an unpublishable private literature that goes 1400 miles and hour and
twentyfivethousand mental institutions.
I say nothing about my prisons nor the millions of underpriviliged who live in
my flowerpots under the light of five hundred suns.
I have abolished the whorehouses of France, Tangiers is the next to go.
My ambition is to be President despite the fact that I'm a Catholic.

America how can I write a holy litany in your silly mood?
I will continue like Henry Ford my strophes are as individual as his
automobiles more so they're all different sexes
America I will sell you strophes $2500 apiece $500 down on your old strophe
America free Tom Mooney
America save the Spanish Loyalists
America Sacco & Vanzetti must not die
America I am the Scottsboro boys.
America when I was seven momma took me to Communist Cell meetings they
sold us garbanzos a handful per ticket a ticket costs a nickel and the
speeches were free everybody was angelic and sentimental about the
workers it was all so sincere you have no idea what a good thing the party
was in 1835 Scott Nearing was a grand old man a real mensch Mother
Bloor made me cry I once saw Israel Amter plain. Everybody must have
been a spy.
America you don're really want to go to war.
America it's them bad Russians.
Them Russians them Russians and them Chinamen. And them Russians.
The Russia wants to eat us alive. The Russia's power mad. She wants to take
our cars from out our garages.
Her wants to grab Chicago. Her needs a Red Reader's Digest. her wants our
auto plants in Siberia. Him big bureaucracy running our fillingstations.
That no good. Ugh. Him makes Indians learn read. Him need big black niggers.
Hah. Her make us all work sixteen hours a day. Help.
America this is quite serious.
America this is the impression I get from looking in the television set.
America is this correct?
I'd better get right down to the job.
It's true I don't want to join the Army or turn lathes in precision parts
factories, I'm nearsighted and psychopathic anyway.
America I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel.

--Allen Ginsberg

Goodnight, street-hassle...

2009-07-01T08:57:00.000-07:00

It's true, Joseph has shuttered street-hassle and has moved on to new projects and adventures.

He was extremely kind enough to let me infuse my own subtle brand of Dollishness over at his lovely site, and I'll forever be grateful to him for giving me such a wonderful opportunity. Joseph Mailander is the kind of writer that I grew up reading in the newspapers' Op-Ed pages... back when they had relevent Op-Ed editors.

Over at my friend Michael Higby's place MayorSam, Michael has penned a very nice farewell to street-hassle:

Tuesday night longtime blog-la-sphere fixture Joseph Mailander took down his Street Hassle blog; one that covered the civic discourse simultaneously in an erudite and cranky [I prefer the word "surly". -ed.] manner holding not only local politicians and mainstream media accountable but bloggers such as yours truly as well.

[snip...]

Joseph provided significant sunshine and water to Mayor Sam not only contributing great and often provocative content but machinating behind the scenes to expose the blog to the movers and shakers in local government as well as local media.

Mailander provided me with many chuckles whether it was his goading of uptight Westside blogger Kevin Roderick, or his creation of catchphrases such describing the LA Times as the Former Fishwrap of Record and coining fun aburdities like 80 FAKE HUIZAR WONDERLANDS (a sly cross-referencing of Councilmember Jose Huizar's trucked in snow holiday events and criticism of alleged fake neighborhood watches claimed by Mayor Villaraigosa when he was a Councilman).

I'm excited to bookmark Joseph's newest site, minor arcana. I suggest you all do the same.

And the Crappiest Dad of the Year Award Goes To...

2009-06-29T20:00:00.001-07:00

...let's broaden the scope, shall we? Let's say the Crappiest Dad of the Twentieth Century, and quite possible the Twenty-First Century as well.

It's no secret that Michael Jackson had major Daddy Issues, and it isn't hard to see why.

Michael K. over at Dlisted has Joe Jackson's cold-ass number down, and calls attention to the timing and appropriateness of old Joe walking the red carpet at the BET awards held Sunday night and his generally being a useless a-hole; an a-hole who has spent the majority of his children's lives pimping them out for every dime he could squeeze; beating his children and wounding them in ways some of them would never recover from.

I know Joe Jackson isn't known for being a fluffy teddy bear filled with hugs and kisses, but dude wasn't even pretending to have the sads about his dead son. When Don said that this must be awful for the entire family, Joe said, "It has. The world lost the biggest star." What he meant by that is...."I just lost my favorite cash cow! MOOO!"

While watching this epic display of uncomfortableness, I wondered why Joe Jackson was even there. And then the answer came to me at the 3:20 mark. Joe actually plugged his new production company and some Blu-Ray Discs he's putting out. This is the most awkward infomercial ever!

I'm surprised Joe didn't go all out by saying, "And Michael Jackson will be buried in NIKE sneakers, because NIKE was his favorite brand. Just do it. Yesh, he loved NIKE. Also, my fondest memories of Michael Jackson is when he would call me on Sunday nights to tell me how delicious HOT POCKETS brand paninis are. Michael used to say how tender and flaky on the outside. HOT POCKETS, Michael Jackson's favorite microwaveable treat. Oh and Michael was also looking forward to seeing ICE AGE: DAWN OF THE DINOSAURS which hits theaters this Wednesday, July 1st.........."

This is going to be, by far, the greatest show Joe Jackson has ever produced... I'll be surprised if he doesn't have Michael's corpse on strings moonwalking in some freak "Weekend at Bernie's" musical number; and while he's looking at whose feet to lay the blame for his son's untimely demise, Mr. Jackson would be well served to take a good look at the man in the mirror.

Summertime

2009-06-23T19:47:00.000-07:00

It's summer, the kids are on vacation (except for the one in summer school. he haz the CHARTER SCHOOL) and it's time for me to take a break as well.

I'll be back after I get the kids settled into their summer groove; I need to find my own summer groove first...

For Zuma Dogg...

2009-06-17T20:49:00.000-07:00

And the Crappiest Mom of the Year Award goes to...

2009-06-16T09:45:00.001-07:00

Ugh. I'm so sick you of conservative LAMERZ who have nothing better to rant and rave about other than a stoopid joke about one of Sarah Palin's stoopid family members and yet somehow, it's okay for John McCain to say this:

"Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly? Because her father is Janet Reno."

Anyways, my secret boyfriend Jim Newell "nails it" (PERV!) once again for all the dum dums who just... don't... get... it, and sadly, never will.

Why does Sarah Palin treat her 14-year-old daughter, Willow, like a piece-of-shit Nerf shield? That’s the real story. Willow’s mother, Sarah Palin, thinks of her young, impressionable daughter as nothing more than a six-month-old McDonald’s bag, reeking of moldy onions, found under the car’s front seat when she’s desperately searching for something to vomit in after downing 20 Crown Royal & gingers, and meth, at eight in the morning.

Because obviously Letterman was making a joke about Bristol Palin, the girl who famously got “knocked up” last year, and not about 14-year-old Willow, who did not. Sarah Palin understood this, guaranteed, and then chose to launch a desperate publicity stunt about how an OLD MAN wanted to RAPE the 14-YEAR-OLD daughter WILLOW. Surely Willow loved seeing her name plastered all over teevee and the Internet like this. Thanks Mom! Go Mom, 2012!

Another “funny” Willow story, from last October: Sarah Palin was invited to drop a ceremonial first puck at the Philadelphia Flyers home opener. Philadelphia Flyers season-ticket holders, of course, are the most violent and confrontational humans since the ancient Spartans, and Sarah Palin knew she would get booed and potentially murdered. So what did she do? She dragged lil’ Willow onto the ice with her! And 7-year-old Piper, too! Everyone booed, still, and she complained afterward about how disturbed those fans must be, to boo small children like that. Meanwhile, Willow was scarred permanently. All those toothless hockey fans, screaming, “BLEEHHHH.” Vomiting. [via Wonkette]

Ha ha. Secret Boyfriend For The Win!

As a mother, I can judge this shit and I will judge this shit: SARAH PALIN IS TEH SUCK AS A MOTHER. She exploits and uses those chldren like nothing I've ever seen before.

Ugh. Total MOM FAIL.

That is all.

PS. IF (HA.. HA... WHEN) MY DAUGHTER GETS KNOCKED UP AT 16 BY A SELF-DESCRIBED "FUKKIN' REDNECK" WHOSE MOMMA IS A METH DEALER, YOU CAN MAKE ALL THE LAME JOKES ABOUT HER YOU WANT... I SWEAR!!!!

Don't have a cow, man!

2009-06-11T09:49:00.000-07:00

Apparently the usual Right Nutwing faction has their panties in a bind yet again...

My girl Sarah K. Smith over at Wonkette gives us the low down on this whole Dave Letterman Fiasco, because really, there's nothing else going on in the world; Hussein Obama is still up to his old Muslin tricks; and it's not like the FOX NEWS FED RIGHT WING EXTREMISTS aren't trying TO KILL US ALL in the name of Bill O'rly and Newt and Sean Hannity. Oh noes, none of that is going on at all...

It's perfectly safe out there for STRAIGHT, LIB, LEFT, PRO-CHOICE, HUSSEIN LOVIN', BROWN, ACORN, SOCIALIST, BABY-KILLER LOVIN', BUDDHIST WHO FRATERNIZES WITH TEH JeWWS GIRL LIKE ME.

from Wonkette:

How many daughters does Sarah Palin have? Like fourteen? Well, David Letterman made a CRUDE REMARK about one of them, apparently intending to refer to the oldest one ( “Bridgeport”) but inadvertently referring to the middle one ( “Jester”).

And yet, somehow... all these OFFENDED (spare me) pundits with their self-righteous punditry are all freaked out about... wait for it... c'mon .... wait for it... a joke. Not really an indecent one, as indecent humor goes; and not even crass or tasteless either, taken in its proper context. At its worst, it's a jab that didn't carry much punch. We know Dave wasn't suggesting the statuatory raping of 14 year olds, but that won't stop certain factions from inserting perversion where there is none simply to score some political points.

Now that's pervy!

A Mother's Work Is Never Done

2009-06-02T16:52:00.000-07:00

I posted this earlier today at street-hassle, with the above graphic (sans Blingee). After an editorial decision, the pic was removed, because after all... we're trying to keep things much more refined over there...

But now here (ahhh... Sweet Here!) my standards, as you can tell, they are not so high. And so I'm reposting the piece here, along with the edited pic. Except I have improooooved the graphic via Blingee. Because I can.

When the going gets tough...

Somehow, none of this surprises me.
via LANews:

Two Southern California women are accused of trying to smuggle an estimated $100,000 worth of marijuana, with two kids in their minivan, officials said. The pot --166 pounds of it -- was discovered by U.S. Border Patrol Monday on Westbound I-8 in Pine Valley, Calif. Agents discovered the bundles of marijuana stuffed into storage compartments in the vehicle.

The 34-year-old driver and 28-year-old passenger, both residents of Los Angeles, were arrested.

Border patrol says a local social services agency took custody of the children.

Ok, I know, a Mom's Gotta Do What A Mom's Gotta Do, but seriously, they couldn't go in on a sitter together?

Beyond that, perhaps discussions about legalization and all the tax revenue that might create for the state could take place in a serious and meaningful way.

Ahh, yes. That's much better now. Off to cook dinner!

A mother's work is never done.

Hell yeah, I'm taking it personally....

2009-06-01T15:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday's murder of noted women's healthcare provider Dr. George Tiller was not only an act of domestic terrorism, it was also an act of sexism and patriarchal misogyny.

American author Sara Paretsky nails it in the guardian.co.uk (emphasis mine):

The National Council of Catholic Bishops, the National Right to Life Committee, Operation Rescue, and other groups opposed to women's reproductive health and privacy are almost all headed by men. In the 36 years since the supreme court decided Roe, followers of these and other groups have performed acts ranging from murder and attempted murder (26), acid attacks (108), bombings (41) and arson (175). Relatives are threatened and support staff attacked.
The head of Operation Rescue issued a statement after Tiller's murder. "He was one of the most evil men on the planet … He deserved … a legal execution." The organisation also compared Tiller to the Nazis.
In Barack Obama's commencement speech at Notre Dame – preceded by protests from Roman Catholic bishops because he is pro-choice – the president urged pro-choicers to find common ground with anti-abortion zealots.
I do not know how you find common ground with someone who says you deserve to die. For such people, women are not as deserving of rights as the foetuses they may carry. Supreme court Justice Anthony Kennedy made that clear: he ruled that one recent law did not need to provide an exception to protect the health of the pregnant woman. This law also allows the partners or parents of a woman who terminates a pregnancy to sue the doctor for emotional damage to themselves. It says, in essence, that a pregnant woman is the property of her parents or male partner.

[snip...]

I hope George Tiller's death begins a real search for common ground. I hope his murder galvanises people into thinking that women deserve equal protection under the law as that accorded to their unborn children. This didn't happen in the wake of Dr David Gunn's murder in Pensacola, nor Dr Barnett Slepian's murder in Buffalo. It didn't happen when protesters at a Cleveland clinic poured petrol on a nurse and set fire to her. It is time we stopped pandering to terrorists just because they claim to be speaking in the name of Jesus. I'm not optimistic, but change in this respect is way overdue in America.

Amen. Again.

Yesterday

2009-05-29T16:18:00.000-07:00

Ha ha.

Hey! The Irish Papists Have the Molesters too!

2009-05-20T13:01:00.000-07:00

photo: peter morrison/AP

The LAT reports on the release of Ireland's Commission to Inquire into Child Abuse report:

from the Times:

The five-volume report is a major blow for a religious institution that continues to wield enormous, albeit declining, influence on Irish society, especially on moral issues such as divorce and abortion.

Even then, it wasn't tough enough for some of the victims. Many are angry that the report includes no names of alleged offenders, an omission that one of the religious orders under investigation won in court. Only pseudonyms are used, making the chances of criminal prosecution slim.

"We expected that these people would be named and shamed and that some of them would be convicted," John Barrett, who testified before the commission, told Irish radio station TodayFM. "At the end of the day, some of us won't sleep tonight. We're still nowhere near the truth."

Findings from the Sexual Abuse section of the Comission to Inquire into Child Abuse

18. Sexual abuse was endemic in boys’ institutions. The situation in girls’ institutions was different. Although girls were subjected to predatory sexual abuse by male employees or visitors or in outside placements, sexual abuse was not systemic in girls’ schools.

19. It is impossible to determine the full extent of sexual abuse committed in boys’ schools. The schools investigated revealed a substantial level of sexual abuse of boys in care that extended over a range from improper touching and fondling to rape with violence. Perpetrators of abuse were able to operate undetected for long periods at the core of institutions.

20. Cases of sexual abuse were managed with a view to minimising the risk of public disclosure and consequent damage to the institution and the Congregation. This policy resulted in the protection of the perpetrator. When lay people were discovered to have sexually abused, they were generally reported to the Gardai. When a member of a Congregation was found to be abusing, it was dealt with internally and was not reported to the Gardaí.

The damage to the children affected and the danger to others were disregarded. The difference in treatment of lay and religious abusers points to an awareness on the part of Congregational authorities of the seriousness of the offence, yet there was a reluctance to confront religious who offended in this way. The desire to protect the reputation of the Congregation and institution was paramount. Congregations asserted that knowledge of sexual abuse was not available in society at the time and that it was seen as a moral failing on the part of the Brother or priest. This assertion, however, ignores the fact that sexual abuse of children was a criminal offence.

21. The recidivist nature of sexual abuse was known to religious authorities.

The documents revealed that sexual abusers were often long-term offenders who repeatedly abused children wherever they were working. Contrary to the Congregations’ claims that the recidivist nature of sexual offending was not understood, it is clear from the documented cases that they were aware of the propensity for abusers to re-abuse. The risk, however, was seen by the Congregations in terms of the potential for scandal and bad publicity should the abuse be disclosed. The danger to children was not taken into account.

22. When confronted with evidence of sexual abuse, the response of the religious authorities was to transfer the offender to another location where, in many instances, he was free to abuse again. Permitting an offender to obtain dispensation from vows often enabled him to continue working as a lay teacher.

Men who were discovered to be sexual abusers were allowed to take dispensation rather than incur the opprobrium of dismissal from the Order. There was evidence that such men took up teaching positions sometimes within days of receiving dispensations because of serious allegations or admissions of sexual abuse. The safety of children in general was not a consideration.

23. Sexual abuse was known to religious authorities to be a persistent problem in male religious organisations throughout the relevant period.

Nevertheless, each instance of sexual abuse was treated in isolation and in secrecy by the authorities and there was no attempt to address the underlying systemic nature of the problem. There were no protocols or guidelines put in place that would have protected children from predatory behaviour. The management did not listen to or believe children when they complained of the activities of some of the men who had responsibility for their care. At best, the abusers were moved, but nothing was done about the harm done to the child. At worst, the child was blamed and seen as corrupted by the sexual activity, and was punished severely.

24. In the exceptional circumstances where opportunities for disclosing abuse arose, the number of sexual abusers identified increased significantly.

For a brief period in the 1940s, boys felt able to speak about sexual abuse in confidence at a sodality that met in one school. Brothers were identified by the boys as sexual abusers and were removed as a result. The sodality was discontinued. In another school, one Brother embarked on a campaign to uncover sexual activity in the school and identified a number of religious who were sexual abusers. This indicated that the level of sexual abuse in boys’ institutions was much higher than was revealed by the records or could be discovered by this investigation. Authoritarian management systems prevented disclosures by staff and served to perpetuate abuse.

25. The Congregational authorities did not listen to or believe people who complained of sexual abuse that occurred in the past, notwithstanding the extensive evidence that emerged from Garda investigations, criminal convictions and witness accounts.

Some Congregations remained defensive and disbelieving of much of the evidence heard by the Investigation Committee in respect of sexual abuse in institutions, even in cases where men had been convicted in court and admitted to such behaviour at the hearings.

26. In general, male religious Congregations were not prepared to accept their responsibility for the sexual abuse that their members perpetrated.

Congregational loyalty enjoyed priority over other considerations including safety and protection of children.

27. Older boys sexually abused younger boys and the system did not offer protection from bullying of this kind.

There was evidence that boys who were victims of sexual abuse were physically punished as severely as the perpetrator when the abuse was reported or discovered. Inevitably, boys learned to suffer in silence rather than report the abuse and face punishment.

28. Sexual abuse of girls was generally taken seriously by the Sisters in charge and lay staff were dismissed when their activities were discovered. However, nuns’ attitudes and mores made it difficult for them to deal with such cases candidly and openly and victims of sexual assault felt shame and fear of reporting sexual abuse.

Girls who were abused reported that it happened most often when they were sent to host families for weekend, work or holiday placements. They did not feel able to report abusive behaviour to the Sisters in charge of the schools for fear of disbelief and punishment if they did.

29. Sexual abuse by members of religious Orders was seldom brought to the attention of the Department of Education by religious authorities because of a culture of silence about the issue.

When religious staff abused, the matter tended to be dealt with using internal disciplinary procedures and Canon Law. The Gardaí were not informed. On the rare occasions when the Department was informed, it colluded in the silence. There was a lack of transparency in how the matter of sexual abuse was dealt with between the Congregations, dioceses and the Department. Men with histories of sexual abuse when they were members of religious Orders continued their teaching careers as lay teachers in State schools.

30. The Department of Education dealt inadequately with complaints about sexual abuse. These complaints were generally dismissed or ignored. A full investigation of the extent of the abuse should have been carried out in all cases.

All such complaints should have been directed to the Gardai for investigation.

The Department, however, gave the impression that it had a function in relation to investigating allegations of abuse but actually failed to do so and delayed the involvement of the proper authority. The Department neglected to advise parents and complainants appropriately of the limitations of their role in respect of these complaints.

Ugh. Just.... ugh.

I think a million dollars per kid, per act of fellatio, vaginal rape and sodomy these kids had to perform/endure should be about right...

And I hope they get it and I hope they spend all that money on all the stupid shit they can buy.

Amen.

Profiles of the Rich and Stupid

2009-05-11T13:30:00.000-07:00

Hotter than Chelsea? Uh.... no. Definitely NO. Wait... OMG those are CHOLA eyebrows!!

We were worried for a bit...

But my Super Secret Sexxxy Ginge Boyfriend, Jim Newell is well and on fiyah, what with all that fire-hair growin' all over ... it's no wonder.

He reports on perpetual Val-Accented Repub Princess Meghan McCain (also known as Dopey McDopette) having a tantrum because Ms. Thang was only given TWO tickets to the White House Correspondents Dinner and homegirl brought TWO friends.

Homegirl can't add. Also.

from Wonkette:

If Meghan ever wants to make Admiral like her grandfather and great-grandfather, this will not do:

Sen. John McCain’s daughter — who writes online for The Daily Beast and will soon release a book about life as a Republican — lost it after getting stopped by security when she arrived at the White House Correspondents dinner Saturday. The problem? She had only two tickets, but brought two friends.

“The security guard sent her to talk to someone to sort out the situation, but Meghan got bratty and nastily told him, ‘We’ll just stand here then,’ like an insolent child,” our source said, adding that after dealing with the guard, “She muttered to her friends, ‘Does he even know who the f— I am?’ ”

An insider told us, “Those tickets were harder to get than gold dust and Meghan blatantly only had two and thought she didn’t have to follow the same rules as everyone else.”

The vocal McCain “was complaining about everything from the air-conditioning to the wait,” says our leak.

Then she got mad at Wanda Sykes for making a joke about how Cindy McCain is rich. Cindy, meanwhile, was able to handle it.

Ugh. Won't these people ever go away? Especially the retarded little McMeghan McCain Dopette, she's so freakin' annoying.

It's a joke... right? Right...???

2009-05-06T13:10:00.000-07:00

Srsly? Is it April Fool's Day?

Today is Prevention of Teen Pregnancy Day, and who is out cold pimpin' for ABSTINENCE? Why if it isn't QUEEN OF TEH ABSTINENCE Bristol Palin Herself, cradling her precious little bundle of ABSTINENCE on the TODAY Show!!!!

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

And as for her Baby Daddy? Levi Johnston say's Bristol's Abstinence campaign is "Unrealistic".

Dude should know.

[via Wonkette and HuffPo]

Filthy Swine (flu)!

2009-04-26T21:19:00.000-07:00

sweethearts practicing safe kissing in Mexico City

from the LAT:

Federal officials declared a public health emergency Sunday involving human swine flu, warning Americans to prepare for widespread outbreaks now or in the future, yet urging them not to panic.

In a briefing at the White House, the acting head of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Dr. Richard Besser, said that eight cases of suspected swine flu in New York had been confirmed and that another had been identified in Ohio, bringing the U.S. total to 20 cases.

Previously announced cases included two in Texas, two in Kansas and seven in California's Imperial and San Diego counties. All the cases were mild and the victims have recovered.

"As we continue to look for cases, we are going to see a broader spectrum of disease," Besser said. "We're going to see more severe disease in this country."

Read the rest of the article here, and keep your cootie-infested asses away from me.